#how many years would it take to pay that off

[qqueenofhades]

been seeing some responses to the many many lawsuits and other actions taken against trumpet and munkfruit that fall along the lines of "this isn't enough, it's already too late, you can't fight fascism with the law, we're all gonna die." i understand the fear, truly, but i'm curious as to your thoughts on it, as to me it seems like this sort of behavior/posting doesn't do much beyond embolden the narrative that everyone actually likes these bastards and they're too powerful to be stopped.

Welp. This is the kind of question that requires me to write a long and complex sociopolitical/critical/historical/Discourse-esque analysis that will take a while and which I am trying to do only selectively, but I'm at home on Saturday morning, I don't have anything else to do right now, and it does present me an opportunity to address some things I've been thinking about. So. We'll give it a shot.

The first thing that has struck me is that in a few short weeks, we're getting a sharp empirical disproving of two common online-leftist fallacies: one, the old "both parties are exactly the same" chestnut, and two, "the only resistance that matters is Violent Glorious Revolution" (which somehow and conveniently never happens). We had months and months of "Biden is just as bad as Trump!!!" being spread as gospel truth in online-leftist circles, and then when Harris took over, it switched just as seamlessly into "Harris is just as bad as [or even worse than] Trump!" Now, as I have said before, there were plenty of legitimate criticisms to make of Biden, particularly the Gaza policy (upon which Harris notably differed). But it's quite telling that the keyboard warriors who spent all of last year howling for The Righteous Punishment of Biden-Harris (regardless that the obvious ancillary consequence was letting Trump come to power) have either disappeared completely when it comes to dealing with the results of that rhetoric, or have switched to "everything is doomed so I guess we shouldn't bother anyway." Like. Trump is now proposing to fully ethnically cleanse Gaza and either blithely hand it over to Israel or build Jared Kushner Beachfront Resort Disneyworld, and what do we hear in protest? For the most part, crickets. These are not serious people. Their opposition is not morally consistent, and it only depends on how they can make themselves look good. I thought that Trump was somehow supposed to be magically better than Biden particularly on the Gaza issue, and that was why it was worth letting him get elected? Or something? Something!?!

I'm curious as to whether those people still legitimately think that Harris would have spent her first few weeks in office dismantling USAID, signing weekly anti-trans executive orders, unleashing ICE across the country and terrorizing immigrant communities, putting the Project 2025 guy in charge of the Office of Management and Budget, letting Elon Musk run rampant with Treasury data, nominating the likes of RFK Jr. and Tulsi Gabbard to Cabinet posts, trying to freeze all federal funding, stripping DEI initiatives, dismantle the Department of Education -- etc. etc. The thing is, as ghoulish as it is, none of this is a surprise, because it is literally what Trump and his people spent the entire presidential campaign loudly, openly, and repeatedly promising to do. However awful they were and are, they were not remotely secret about their intentions. That information was out in the open every time they opened their mouths. But too many people didn't pay attention, rationalized it away, decided that "he won't actually do that" (despite the fact that he launched a literal violent coup attempt on the Capitol the last time he was in office), or just made up their minds that Trump Will Reduce Grocery Prices and refused to listen to any information that countered that view. What do we get now? Trump laughing off the grocery-prices issue and insisting that it's "not a priority" and Musk managing to claim that the real problem is government spending, not corporate greed. Again, this was completely predictable, because y'all got willingly suckered. It was not hard to see it coming.

That said: if the Glorious Online Leftist Revolution is still coming, and by some lights we might now legitimately need it, where the fuck is it? Are they still out there banging the drum against Trump and his "let's ethnically cleanse Gaza" policy and anything else that they insisted, they swore up and down, was functionally equivalent or possibly even marginally better than Biden-Harris getting another term? No. They're either dead silent, offering weak excuses, or completely giving into "we're doomed there's no point fighting back through weak shitlib institutions that are obviously terrible and will fail" blubbering that makes no fucking sense. One, because they move the goalposts so constantly that there's not even any attempt to reckon with the last effects of their damaging bullshit, and two? As I said, where's the fucking Revolution magically coming to save us and install a perfect leftist utopia (which is never how revolutions have ever worked) and sweep away Government Tyranny? Is that only for when a Democrat is in office and you can have confidence that the government is not going to come after you in the middle of the night for talking about it? Now that there's an actual fascist in power, it's somehow too hard to resist at all, even in small, institutional, and everyday ways that are often far more effective at practically confounding the bad stuff instead of empty and useless online echo chambers, so guess we should all just give up??!

Fuck. That.

This is also why we have to talk about the catastrophic lack of information literacy and critical thinking skills in young leftist spaces. A good example is the recent migration of TikTok users to the Chinese app RedNote. It was sweet for a little while as there was cultural exchange and friendship and memes. But then, predictably, it dove hard into "ah, once again The Evil US Government Has Lied To Us and there are no problems at all in China!" I have seen posts float by on my dash that unironically claim this is the case and China is truly great and Americans should want to move there and clearly all that business about authoritarian control and mass repression was just a ruse by, again, The Evil US Government. If you are so utterly devoid of basic information literacy and research abilities that your standard of proof for "is the Chinese government repressively authoritarian and totalitarian" is "a random Chinese person on an app in a country where the Internet is viciously controlled and voicing the slightest criticism can make you disappear told me that it isn't," then for Christ's fucking sake, you need help. For one, it wasn't just the US government saying this. It was, y'know, Chinese dissidents, the entire nation of Taiwan, historians, academics, researchers, the Uyghur Muslims of Xinjiang, etc etc. If your only standard for believing or supporting anything is "the opposite of what the US government thinks," then you are perfect targets for authoritarianism. Hey, a person living under an authoritarian regime who will punish them if they speak out against it told me everything was fine! Clearly there's nothing to worry about and we should want it here in America!

Come on. Come on.

This is also the case because uneducated young leftists like to unironically label themselves "communists" or "Marxist-Leninists" as if it's cool and hip and has never been involved in anything problematic in all of history, so anything that calls itself that must be supported. Shoutout to the idiot in my notes recently who reblogged a several-year-old post just to shout at me about how historical communists NEVER worked with or collaborated with fascists, because something something The Communists Were The Pure Shining Good Guys! (Uh, nobody tell them about the Molotov-Ribbentrop Pact.) Clearly, the Chinese Communist Party is good and beneficial, end of story, no more criticism or caution needed! Obviously, yes, official American policy toward China has often been driven by basic Sinophobia, and the determination that nobody can change American hegemony or unipolarity or its ability to call the shots how it pleases. But if that is the literally only criteria you're using, then yeah. If you're so unaware that "the Chinese people are ordinary human beings" and "the Chinese government is repressive and authoritarian" are statements that can and in fact do coexist, then apparently you've missed the situation you're in right now, where "the American people are ordinary human beings" and "the American government is repressive and authoritarian" is also the case. Because online leftism is essentially devoid of a consistent moral principle and will just blithely switch up to support Bad Things as long as they're being done by governments with the correct ideological label, here we are.

Anyway. This is getting long, but the main takeaway is that the "all resistance against Trump is doomed and I guess we just gotta die :(" line is now, somehow, often coming from the same people who were constantly yelling that the only hope was a Glorious Revolution against Biden-Harris, and it is somehow even stupider. So you'll trumpet about Gloriously Overthrowing The Government all the day long as long as a Democrat is in office, but the instant a Republican gets in there instead and starts acting like an actual fascist, welp, time to just shut up and accept our doom and not even bother to struggle? Please tell me how any of that makes sense. Especially when actively confounding the Trump/Musk Axis of Evil is already working. There is also the fact that the establishment-media types are supporting this narrative for reasons of their own; witness the fact that the entire US corporate media is owned by oligarchs who hastened to bend the knee and pledge fealty to Trump 2.0. They obviously also have a reason for inculcating hopelessness in you, and that the only recourse is to shut up, accept it, and let them continue to rob you blind. Because American democracy will never matter as much as money, power, and control for the Billionaire Bros.

The point is: this is a bad-faith narrative on all sides. Whether it's coming from the online leftists in their latest head-spinningly hypocritical volte-face, the oligarch-owned corporate media that wants to feed you constant Bad News to keep you clicking and worried and distracted and unable to resist, the Trumpist power that wants people to quit making this pesky stink about all their authoritarian fascist adventures, or anyone else. There is nobody who has your best interests at heart if they are telling you that everything is doomed and the only thing to do is lie down and take it. There is no logical reason you should listen to them. Go forth and keep resisting, in whatever way presents itself. Those cumulative small actions are far more effective than any Splendid Revolution that never, ever materializes, while the people who preach it just sit back and whine about how things are so bad now so clearly they couldn't. Shut up.

It is always important. It always matters. It will make a difference.

Courage, etc.

[organic-bloodbath]

Hello! Could you write about Thanos and reader being childhood friends (also grew up having hugh crushes on each other) until they grew apart when he became a rapper, now they meet again in squid game when the reader is there to pay off her college debt and they almost didn't recognize each other because of how much time has gone by. When Thanos sees the reader in Gi-hun's group and finally recognizes her, he then remembers his long crush for the reader and falls more in love with her.

You and me, forever

Summary: As above.

A/N: Feeding you more fluffy softie Thanos, i hope this is okay 💜

☆☆☆

~ First meeting ~

Thanos and you had known each other ever since you were 8 years old, soon after you had moved to Korea from Japan.

One day everyone in your class had to make a Valentine's day card and give it to one of your classmates. The gesture didn't have to mean much in any deeper way, you were only 8 after all, but it brightened the children's day for getting a nice gesture from their classmate. You were allowed to give more than one if you wished so, it wasn't limited to one only.

Everyone got one or more, except you. You thought that you had been left without a card and you didn't know who you could give yours to, since you were mostly ignored by your classmates. You had difficulties being social, so you hadn't managed to make friends yet.

Until he approached you.

"Hi," he said quietly, almost shyly. "Here, this is for you. If you want, that is."

He offered you a pink card which had a red heart, sprinkled with red glitter, and the words of "Hapy Valetine's Day", with a typo, which you found adorable. You looked at him and blushed, you had seen him sitting in the back of the class but he had never spoken to you before.

"Oh, um," you stuttered and hesitantly took the card. "Thank you. Uh, here. You can have this."

You gave him your card, which was bright yellow with two stick figures holding hands, 'Happy Valentine's Day' written on top of them. The boy smiled at you.

"My name's Su-bong."

"I'm Y/N."

☆☆☆

~ First token of friendship ~

When you were 13 years old, you were in your room with him, sitting on the floor cross-legged, and making bracelets by putting different color beads into a plastic band. It was such a girly thing to do, but he had suggested it when he saw you wearing bracelets with two of your female friends.

"Here," he said and put the bracelet he had made on your wrist. You had finished yours a little after and put it on his wrist.

"I'll make sure to wear this for the rest of my life, Su-bong," you smiled.

"Me too, Y/N."

☆☆☆

~ First crush ~

The first time you truly realized your crush on him was when you were 14. Before that as a child, you hadn't really cared about boys in a romantic way, while your friends had talked boy dramas many times already and ranking the cutest boys in your class. You had been too young for that, until now.

Thanos, on the other hand, had developed a crush on you years before you were getting familiar with your feelings, but he didn't dare to tell you before you'd be older. He also thought that it would be just a silly little crush which would go away on its own, since he didn't have many other female friends, if at all, but his feelings just got stronger as more time passed.

On Valentine's Day, you were sick, having a high fever and couldn't get up from bed. Su-bong stayed at your house that day, watching movies with you. Your parents had to work late that night, so Su-bong warmed you some soup and made sure you had everything you needed.

He gave you strawberry ice cream, a bag of your favorite candies and a 'Happy Valentine's Day' card which you got each other every year.

"Didn't you have plans with your friends in an hour?" you asked. "You should leave so you have time to go home first."

"They'll be fine without me for one evening. I'm not leaving you alone in this state."

As expected, he got sick too a day later, but he would still always take care of you when you fell ill.

☆☆☆

~ First kiss ~

The first kiss you shared was at the age of 16. Neither of you had been prepared for it, it was just a total accident - atleast at first.

You had gone to the movies, and he was walking you home. You usually went to the movies together once a month, so it was nothing new, really. You shared your favorite scenes of the movie and overall what you thought about it. Usually you managed to choose a movie you both enjoyed, since you had very similar taste in movies.

When you arrived at your doorstep, you turned towards Su-bong one last time.

"Thank you for the evening, it was fun," you smiled, getting a smile back from him.

"It was, i'll see you tomorrow?"

"I'll text you."

You were reaching towards his face to give him a quick kiss on his cheek, like you always did when you wished him a goodbye, but this time Su-bong turned his head just in time to accidentally make you kiss on his lips.

Your eyes widened and your cheeks felt suddenly hot for what had happened. You could see the same expression on his face as well, his cheeks turning pink.

"Oh, i'm, uh, i'm sorry, i didn't mean to-" he rambled.

"Yeah, me neither, it was totally just an accident," you tried to brush it off, but your voice was shaking. "Well, i'll just go then. Bye."

You turned around to leave but he grabbed your wrist, pulling you back towards him. You looked at him with your brows furrowed, cheeks still red.

"Can i... can i do that again?" he asked and put his hand on your cheeks, which sent electric sparks across your face. "If that's okay."

You didn't say anything back, just glanced at his lips and soon he pressed them on yours, pulling you into a kiss he had wanted to do for a long time by now.

You only melted in his arms and didn't want to let go.

☆☆☆

~ First broken heart ~

The last time you saw Su-bong was when you had finished high school. You left to attend college and he put his time to build a career as a rapper. You were so proud of him that he was finally achieving something that he had put a lot of work on and reaching his dreams.

When you moved away and you saw him for the last time, he promised that you'd stay in touch. You'd text, call, write letters, send postcards - anything. However, you decided to stay only as friends, since you both were sure a long distance relationship wouldn't work anyway and it would only end up ruining both of you.

Your love for him and his for you never faded, not even a little bit. You made a promise that whenever your studies would be over, you'd go back to Su-bong and start a life together, finally settling down wherever life was going to take you.

And you did stay in touch regularly, almost every day, for the first few months. Until he completely ghosted you and cut you out of your life without a word. It was like you had stopped existing for him. You had always supported him the most and when he walked into the music industry, he forgot all about you, and you never got to know the reason behind all that.

You thought it was supposed to be just the two of you, no matter what, until the world would end. When you didn't hear from him ever again, it was the first time you experienced having a broken heart.

☆☆☆

Now, ten years later, you were playing these games to either live or die. You had figured you weren't in as severe debts as most of the other players here, but you still had a lot of college debts to pay off. You had trouble finding work which would help you live comfortably and get the debts off your back. And you wanted them gone as soon as possible to move on with your life.

When people started dying during the first game, only one bullet in the head making them collapse on the ground, you were more terrified than ever before. One wrong move and you'd be one of the corpses as well. But you survived it, moving on to the next one after a good night's sleep - although, you were barely managing to fall asleep at all, the dozens of shots still ringing in your ears.

When Thanos saw you for the first time after an entire decade, he didn't recognise you at first. The last time he had seen you, you had dyed your long hair from your natural dark brown to lighter brown and had cut yourself bangs with your mom's kitchen scissors. You had used makeup, mostly playing with eyeliner and dark eyeshadow, putting on some lipstick once in a while, staining Thanos' cheek every time you had to go home, giving him a short kiss of goodbye. Although, obviously he had seen you without makeup too, but not as often as you both grew up towards adulthood.

Now, you had your natural hair color back, had grown out your bangs and weren't wearing any makeup. You had cut your hair shorter, just above your shoulders.

When the second game was about to start and you had to find a group of five, Thanos was missing couple of people for his group too. He was about to approach a girl who seemed to be alone, her back turned towards him, but before he managed to reach her, an older man - that same psycho shouting outside during the first game how you all were going to die - had come to talk to her, soon leading her to his group. Thanos sighed and turned around to scan other free players.

Thanos didn't look towards every group going through the challenge, perhaps a couple of them, until it was the turn of his group.

His group passed easily, as expected.

When the door opened and the last group arrived back, he heard a girl laughing. He got chills all the way down his spine. He could recognise that laugh anywhere. He looked towards the group arriving, and even though he was further away from you, he easily recognised you.

Y/N.

You were laughing at something another guy said, he couldn't hear what, but your laugh flew into his ears easily, as if it was meant specifically to him.

Was it really you? It couldn't be, it must be only someone who resembled you a lot. If it truly was you, he was anxious to face you. He knew you must be angry at him for abandoning you like he did years ago. He regretted putting his dreams of becoming a rapper before you, but he could never take it back. He couldn't have you back, could he?

Before the second game, you had been almost right in front of him before the other man had reached to you first. If he had been a minute earlier there, he could have faced you and in that case, almost have a seizure for the sudden shock.

"What are you staring at?" Nam-gyu asked but Thanos didn't move his gaze away from you for even a second. You weren't looking at his direction at all, keeping your attention on the conversation with those men. You looked like you were having a good time, and to see you smile had always warmed Thanos' heart.

"Nothing, mind your own business," Thanos scoffed.

"Fine, just asked," Nam-gyu rolled his eyes.

☆☆☆

Your gazes across the room met for the first time that same evening after the votings were over. You had pressed X, separating you from him to the opposite team.

He couldn't read your expression well what you might have been thinking. Your gaze seemed empty, like you had no emotions when Thanos looked at you. Surely you recognised him, right?

He hadn't expected you to excitedly wave your hand at him, then run towards him and fall into his arms, wrapping yourself around him so tightly he could barely breathe.

"Oh, Su-bong, i missed you so much!" you would exclaim against his shirt. "Thank god you're here!"

But no. You only turned your head back to player 456 and player 388.

Thanos wanted to go and talk to you more than anything but what would he say? And in front of your team too? He had to wait so you'd be alone but he didn't know how long that would take, you seemed to be glued to your group.

Would you want to talk to him? He knew you must be angry at him for doing and acting how he did - the one person who had supported him through all the good and bad. He knew he'd have to earn your forgiveness.

☆☆☆

During the Mingle game, when it was time to find a group of 2, Thanos saw you in the distance. Player 388 was holding your hand, starting to lead you towards a room, but Thanos ran towards you before you managed to run too far.

He grabbed your free hand and pulled you to him, squeezing your hand so tightly in his that you couldn't let go.

Thanos pushed you into a room with him and soon, the door was locked.

"What the hell do you think you are doing?!" you yelled. "I was with Dae-ho! And if he's dead when i walk out of this room, i'll never forgive you."

You were looking into his eyes, anger flaming in them and Thanos was even a little afraid, almost taking a step back.

"Listen, i just needed to talk to you alone-"

"And you could have done that when the game ended, hm? Or are you so scared to face me in front of your friends and everyone else? Scared if i'd be pissed off at you after these years or what?"

"Please just, let's talk," Thanos pleaded.

You just crossed your arms on your chest.

"Okay, speak," you spat.

"I'm sorry," Thanos said quickly. "You have no idea how much i regret pushing you away from me."

You wiped your face with your palm in frustration and closed your eyes for a moment. When Thanos noticed what you had on your wrist, his heart stopped for a moment. He quickly grabbed your hand, even though you tried to pull away at first.

"You still wear this?" Thanos whispered, brushing his fingers on the colorful beads on your bracelet. The exact same one Thanos had made for you when you were only 13 years old.

A tint of blush rose on your cheeks and you tried to look away, but Thanos turned your head back to look at him, finger on your chin.

"Why?" Thanos asked quietly.

"I don't know, i just like it," you mumbled, trying to act all nonchalant, but when Thanos pulled his sleeve up, your face fell.

You looked at the pink and purple beads you had put on the bracelet years ago.

"You're my lucky charm," Thanos smiled. "Even though we grew apart, i always needed to keep a part of you with me."

Your stomach twisted and eyes were in risk to start watering up but you managed to keep your cool.

"Oh, wow, well," you mumbled, a slight smile visiting your face, but you forced it away as quickly as it had appeared. "If you wanted to keep me with you, why did you cut me off?"

Your face looked extremely hurt and it broke Thanos' heart.

"I don't know," he awkwardly said. "Everything became so hectic and busy, you were so far away from me... i don't know."

You let out a deep sigh.

"Would there be a possibility for a second chance, perhaps?" Thanos asked carefully, almost afraid to say the words outloud. Your time in the small room was running down, and Thanos needed to make sure you didn't start avoiding him for the rest of the games. "I want to make things better between us. And I'd be happy to hear what your life is like these days."

"Depends if you just killed my new friend or not."

☆☆☆

Dae-ho was alright, he had found a partner after Thanos had ripped you away from him so rudely during the game. Thank god for that. You had immediately rushed towards Dae-ho and apologised for Thanos' behavior.

You and Thanos sat together, just the two of you, and talked about both of your lives a little bit. He told you about his life as a rapper, all the good and bad sides of it, and even though you were slightly mad at him, you couldn't be more proud of him what he had achieved by far. You told him about your life in college and your studies, as well as some of your friends.

"You know," Thanos started slowly. "I've looked at your Instagram once in a while."

You lifted your eyebrows, surprised for a moment.

"I just wanted to see how you were doing. Your life seemed so good and it looked like you had it all well. You posted pictures of your friends, so i thought you had enough people around you that you wouldn't need me anymore," Thanos confessed, his voice turning more quiet as he spoke.

"Su-bong..."

"I shouldn't have just assumed things because of social media but you just looked so happy."

"I am happy with my life," you admitted. "But that doesn't mean that there wouldn't be space for you too."

Thanos looked at you with a sad smile.

"I'm sorry," he sighed. "Eventually i just got afraid of suddenly messaging you out of nowhere, so i never did."

"I would always take you back into my life, no matter how mad i would get at you," you sighed. He broke your heart and as the years passed, you thought you had gotten over him. But now that he was sitting right next to him, you knew you could never walk out of the door when he was still in the room. "You were the most important person to me half of my childhood, it leaves a deep mark into my heart, even if i didn't want to have it."

"You were the most important person to me too," he whispered.

You didn't answer for that, your thoughts and feelings were just a huge mess right now. Thanos wanted to take your hand in his, your hands had always been so soft, but he was anxious you might not let him.

"So," Thanos started awkwardly after a short silence. "Is there a boyfriend in the picture right now?"

"There was," you said, "but we broke up a few weeks ago."

Thanos felt two emotions at the same time of your words - happy for himself, sad for seeing the sorrow on your face.

"What happened?"

"He cheated on me," you chuckled nervously, though you found nothing funny about that. "Yeah, we dated for a year and he was sleeping with another girl for a few months."

Thanos felt anger inside him. How could anyone cheat on such a beautiful girl like you? Who was not only beautiful on the outside, but on the inside as well. Thanos laid his hand on your shoulder.

"What's his name? You want me to go and beat him up when we get home?" Thanos asked and by the tone of his voice you weren't sure if he was only joking or dead serious. "Just say the word and i'll go give him a little life lesson on how to treat women."

"God, no," you laughed. "He's not worth any more of my attention and i don't want you to get in trouble. How about you then? Any girl in sight who you've already introduced to your parents?"

Thanos looked at you in the eyes for a moment, slight smile on his lips.

"There is one," Thanos said.

"Hm, really?" you asked, sounding almost surprised. You felt a sting in your heart which you tried to ignore.

"Yep, my parents absolutely adore her. I've been in love with her for years. She's funny, beautiful, though very clumsy, her laugh makes me go insane and i could listen to her tell stories all day," Thanos described. "The list of things what i've always loved about her is endless."

"She sounds like a perfect girl," you said quietly, trying not to sound hurt.

Thanos put his finger on your chin and made you look at him in the eyes.

"And she's sitting right in front of me, right now," Thanos said with teary eyes. "And i miss all the years i've wasted apart from her."

You bit your lip, heart hammering against your chest so hard you were sure it could burst open any moment.

"Y/N," Thanos started. "When the games are over - will you give me another chance? To be a part of your life?"

A smile spread on your face.

"I'll beg on my knees as long as i need to," he said and went down on his knees in front of you, finally taking your hands in his.

"Get up," you chuckled. "Buy me a dinner and i'll think about it." And that was enough for Thanos.

You pulled him up and wrapped your arms around him. This was the moment you realised how much you truly had missed this man. It didn't matter how long you would be apart, he'd always be that one person who you wanted by your side for the rest of your life.

Even after all this time, you knew it wouldn't be hard to start loving him again. You'd have to take it slowly, scared of him breaking you again, but you'd welcome him back.

You'd always take him back.

[absurdthirst]

Beauty and the Bloodsucker {Max Phillips x F!Reader}

Ratings: Explicit

Word Count: 11.6k

Warnings: Beauty and Beast AU, magical enchantments, imprisonment(?), quasi hostage, Stockholm syndrome-ish, magical timelines, seduction, blood drinking (Max is a vampire beast), oral sex (female receiving), loss of virginity, beastly sex, heartbreak, depression, fear/anger, castle attack, pillaging, threats of death, gunshot, blood, breaking the spell, arrogant/playful Max, happily ever after

Comments: Just an excuse to have Max be the Beast!

Co-written with @storiesofthefandomlovers

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|| MasterList || Max Phillips MasterList ||

Click Keep Reading only if you have read the Rating and Warnings and understand the warnings may not be complete to avoid listing spoilers. As AO3 says 'creator chooses not to use warnings'. You also agree that you're the right age to be consuming anything here.

“We should go back.” You whisper, dragging your cloak closer around your body as the wind whips through the bare branches of the trees and seems to speak. The voices are almost incoherent but it makes the dread pool in your stomach. “We cannot.” The shadows play off the light from the small torch in your brother’s hand as he turns back towards you, a heavy frown on his face. “The rent is due and if we do not pay, we will be tossed out on the street.” The landlord that owned the little cottage you live in had decided to raise your rent when you declined to marry him. He is vengeful and yet you know that no one in the small town you live in would help you. Everyone is terrified of him. “This place is massive. And deserted.” Your brother had come home yesterday, claiming he had discovered a way to raise the money for your increased rent. The washing you had taken in was no longer enough. “We will simply find a few things to sell here.”

You hear chatter coming from the shadows and you shiver again, “please. Let’s go.” You beg your brother who spins on his heel, “would you shut the fu-” His insult dies as his eyes flicker to something over your shoulder. “That’s not the way you speak to a lady.” The beast tuts, his wings spanned out behind him and his fangs glistening in the moonlight. 

You spin around and gasp, the scream dying in your throat with the way your brother grabs you. “Run. Get out of here!” Your brother screams and the beast scoffs, “she’s not going anywhere. Neither of you are. You stole from me. You dared to steal more from my castle. I should kill you.” Max chuckles darkly, “I am bored…I think I’ll kill you.” He decides but you step forward, “don’t kill us. Surely there’s some agreement we can come to.” You plead, eyes wide as you take in the beast. 

“Hmmm,” Max hums, “an agreement. I think -  a trade. You have taken from me after all.” You choke, “we don’t have anything. Our landlord has taken it all. We don’t own anything unless…unless you take me.” You offer, knowing you are condemning yourself to death but your brother is stronger. He can come back to save you. The beast stares at you, his dark eyes taking you in, and he sighs. He hasn’t had a companion for many years. Not since the last one died of natural causes. “Very well.” He decides, knowing that he would enjoy the company for a while, “how much gold for your sister?” The beast asks and you stand straight despite your hands shaking at the idea of remaining in the cold, damp castle.

“You cannot-“ your brother hisses and you shake your head. “He will kill us.” You remind him, not taking your eyes off the beast. His face almost looks human but there are heavy bones in the face, his eyes yellow and the glint of his fangs in the dim moonlight make your heart race. You take a shuddering breath. “Thirty pieces.” You decide, making your brother’s eyes widen. “You can live a comfortable life.” You finally turn towards him and take his cold hands in your own. “Marry. Perhaps our landlord will lower the rent when he learns I have, um, left.”

Your brother shakes his head, “no. No. I will not leave you here with a monster.” Max growls at that, the sound echoing off the wall, and you shudder in fear but try to stay strong. “Please. Let him go.” You beg to the monster who tilts his head, almost like he’s appraising you. “Very well. Thirty coins.” Max snaps his fingers, nails long and yellow, to the shadows and your brother shakes his head, “you cannot do this. He will kill you.” Your brother pleads but you reach for him to hug him. You don’t get to as a bag of coins is thrown on the floor and an arm wraps around your waist. You scream and your brother reaches for you but it’s too late. 

By the time you blink, you’re in a bedroom and the door is locked behind you. “You bastard! You didn’t let me say goodbye!” You shout, rushing over to bang your fists on the door. “You didn’t let me say goodbye.” You choke, tears in your eyes as the realization hits you. You have been sold to a monster.

Max stands outside the door, listening to your cries and curses. Something deep inside him stirs, his long talons hovering above the doorknob for a moment before he pulls his hand away. The deal had been struck and you had made it willingly. He strides away, his wings flapping slightly as he goes to find his housekeeper. A new tenant has arrived and she must be made aware.

You sniff as there’s a knock on the door, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand, and you stumble to stand up just as the door is unlocked. An older woman walks in, a warm smile on her face that puts you immediately at ease. “Hello dearie. Max told me we have a new guest. I wanted to introduce myself. My name is Mrs. Smith and I am the housekeeper. We want to make sure you are comfortable. What foods do you like?” She asks, trailing her eyes along your figure, “and we will arrange for new clothes and you may change the bedroom however you wish.” She promises and you swallow harshly, “I - I- Max? Is that the beast’s name?” You ask, a frown on your face. 

“Maxwell Phillips.” She informs you, “his family have owned this castle for centuries.” She smiles, “now, let me fetch you some tea. You may roam anywhere in the castle but stay away from the left wing.” She warns and you nod, curious but too emotional to move from the safety of the bedroom. “Thank you.” You murmur, your throat hoarse.

You are a pretty thing, and Max likes pretty. She hums to herself as she walks down the hall, thinking about the years that have passed with her and the rest of the staff remaining the same age since the curse was cast and how many companions have been here over those centuries. It’s been a lonely existence and she sighs when she hears Francis and Corbin arguing down the hall. There is not a day that goes by that those two do not squawk at each other and if it weren’t for the fact that none of them technically could die, she would murder them herself. “Stop it!” She hisses, glaring at them when she rounds the corner and finds the tall and lanky man about the tussle with the short, portly one. “You would think after one hundred years you would find a way to get along!” She chides them. “We have a guest and I will not have you stressing her. Poor thing looks frightened.”

“Do you think she could be the one? To break the curse?” Francis asks, his eyes wide and excited. The servants in the castle have been frozen, not aging for centuries, and it’s lonely when they only have each other and cannot form other bonds. 

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Corbin scoffs, “she will be like the rest. You know he gets wearisome and agitated by them after a while. They all end up-” He drags his finger across his throat. “Can we see her? Is she pretty? If she’s beautiful she may be the one.” Francis says with hope but Mrs. Smith shakes her head, “leave her be for now. She must settle in. She has many lonely days ahead of her. You know Maxwell takes days to come down from his beastly form.” 

The men nod and Francis sighs, “let us prepare dinner for her. Surely if we treat her well, she will want to stay.” Corbin rolls his eyes, “perfect plan. Here’s a feast. Please stay and fall in love with our master so his curse is broken and we can finally live a normal life.” Francis scoffs, “you know nothing. The way to a heart is through the stomach. She will love us and in turn, love him.” The men continue to bicker while Mrs. Smith makes her way to the kitchen to check on the cook who is preparing supper for everyone. You sigh, eyes sore from sobs as you stare out the window to the vast forest, unaware that Max is doing the same thing across the castle.

Max turns away from the window, looking at the glass covered blood red rose, sparkling with the enchantment and the old crone’s words haunt him. The petals had begun to wilt and he knows that he will fail. He will be doomed to wear his grotesque monster form for eternity once the last petal falls. “She will not have anything to do with me.” He growls, hating himself for finding her so beautiful. Her smell is intoxicating and he wishes to drink from her. He flaps his wings and from the broken window of his chambers, he flies off into the night in search of an animal to drain of their lifeblood.

You look up when there’s a knock on the door and you see Mrs. Smith pushing a cart full of food. “Wow. I - this is all for me?” You ask and she nods, “I can’t - this is too much. I am happy with bread and some soup.” You promise and she tuts, “don’t be silly dearie. You must eat.” She insists and you stand up, making your way over to the cart and you inhale the smell of chicken and potatoes. “Thank you.” You murmur and she nods, “settle in. Tomorrow, we will give you a tour of the estate.”

Mrs. Smith walks towards the door and looks back to find you piling a plate high with the chicken. She wonders if it has been quite a while since you’ve had a hearty, proper meal. The staff will love spoiling you if you turn out to be as sweet as you seem to be.

The food is plentiful and you feel stuffed after you finish eating. Back home, you’d be lucky to have meat for dinner unless your brother spent the day hunting. You stare out the window and you wonder what your future holds. You haven’t seen the beast yet. You wonder if he will show.

****

Max flies high above the ground, watching the world as it passes under him with great flaps of his wings. Flying is probably his only escape from the reality of his existence. Your blood is already calling to him and he cannot attack you, not when you are so beautiful and scared of him. Glancing down, he spots a deer and growls, his fangs popping out and he swoops down to capture his meal. 

You finish your meal and Mrs. Smith returns to take it away and says you will meet the seamstress tomorrow for new clothes and you shake your head, “I don’t need - I have clothes.” You explain, and Mrs. Smith raises her eyebrows, “you have nothing with you, dear. We will supply you with what you need.” She promises, “Mr. Phillips supplies us with everything we need.” She promises and you sigh, “it’s nice to put a name to the monstrous face.”

“He was not always so monstrous.” She tuts as she cleans up the plates and stacks everything on the trolly to roll it out of your room. “There was once a time when Mr. Phillips was considered the most handsome man in the lands. Unfortunately, he was also very vain as well.” She sighs. “His existence is one that haunts him now.” 

You scoff, “he may have been handsome but inside he’s a monster. Buying me from my brother…I do not know his purpose and I never wish to find out.” You promise and she nods, sighing softly, “very well. Get some rest. Tomorrow, your new life begins.” She says and strides out of your room. You shake your head, “I won’t be staying here.” You murmur to yourself when she’s gone. You refuse to let that monster keep you prisoner. After a few hours pass, you grab your cape and wrap it around yourself, opening the bedroom door and sneaking into the hallway. The halls are empty and quiet and you tiptoe through the castle, finding a door to escape. You hear voices down the hall, “she will come around. He must have her fall for him. It’s our last chance.” You frown at that and wait until the footsteps disappear and you escape through the door, making your way into the gardens. You exhale shakily, the moon lighting your way as you run through the hedges until you’re in the forest. It’s dark and your heart pounds in your chest as you struggle to find your way. You hear a howl and start to run, your cape flowing behind you and you keep glancing over your shoulder. You miss the tree roots across the ground and cry out as you fall forward, twisting your ankle and you hear leaves crunch before a figure looms over you. You scream, terrified as the monster is above you.

Max growls, furious that you are trying to escape, but he doesn’t strike you. Instead he reaches down, ignoring your scream as he gathers you up in his arms. His wings push the two of you off the ground and he shoots up into the sky. “Foolish girl.” He hisses as he flies up over the treetops with you in his grasp. “Do you know what roams these woods? Beside me?” 

Your next scream echoes but is lost to the sky as he carries you back to the castle. You cling to him, your eyes squeezed shut as you try to not look down. You stumble when he sets you down in the gardens and you scramble away from him, his wings spread out and blocking the moon from your gaze. “You’re - you just - oh my-” Your eyes roll into the back of your head as you collapse from the shock of flying and the reality that you’re trapped here in this castle.

Max rolls his eyes and sighs as he looks down at you. Realizing that he can’t leave you on the cold hard ground. His wings fold against his back and he reaches down to pick you up again, opting to carry you without flying back to your room. The servants gawk at him as he trudges through the halls with your body limp in his arms, ignoring the whispers as he carries you to the bed and lays you down far more gently than you deserve. “Now stay.” He commands, unable to resist caressing your cheek before turning away and closing the door behind him. 

When you wake up, it’s daylight and you inhale sharply as the events of last night come back to you. He flies. He flew with you in his arms. The thought makes you sick and you sit up, trying to inhale deeply to control yourself. You are terrified of the man you’ve been sold to but you can’t leave. It’s clear he will find you and there’s no way you can survive in the woods alone. You sigh, rubbing your forehead. You need him to let you go. There’s a knock on your door and you stand, watching Mrs. Smith roll in a tray full of fruits and breads. It’s more food than you have had in months. “Thank you.” You murmur and she nods, turning to leave, “the master wants to speak with you after you finish breakfast and we will find you a dress to wear until your new ones are finished.” She announces and you nod, knowing this could be the chance to convince him to let you go.

“You must woo her.” Andrew advises, having been Max’s valet for many years, making Max snort as he paces. “With this face?” He sneers, his fangs hanging over the edge of his lips and his face unable to shift out of his monstrous form. “I am a beast.” He growls, once again struck by the irony. All of his staff are still human looking, only he took the true form of a vampire and it has been his damnation. No one could see past his anger and his ugly countenance to see the witty humor or sharp sarcasm he possesses. It was a shame really, because he finds himself hilarious.

You follow Mrs. Smith through the halls until you enter a room and you gasp as you look around. It’s a huge library with books scattered everywhere and it seems to go on forever. “Wow.” You murmur, glancing around the room until you hear his voice, “I take it you like to read?” He asks and you nod, “very much so. It’s - wow. You must have hundreds of books in here.” You exclaim and he chuckles, “try thousands.” You shake your head, “it would take forever to read every book in here.” Max chuckles, “well, it’s a good thing I have forever.” You frown, taking in his image in the daylight. The heavy brow and yellow eyes are scary but the wings are tucked behind him and he looks almost human. “Why did you bring me back here?” You demand to know why he didn’t let you run.

He doesn’t frown, but he tilts his head, as if you are an odd curiosity. “You agreed to stay with me.” He reminds you. “For the thirty pieces of gold I gave your brother. You agreed.” He stresses before he gestures towards the library. “You don’t like your new home? You need more books? More dresses?” He asks, wondering what would make you happy here.

“I agreed because my brother needed to survive. We were struggling. Could barely find enough coin to eat and our landlord put our rent up after I declined his proposal. I - I wanted to sacrifice myself for my brother. He deserves a chance and I never - I was not going to marry a villager. They don’t like women who read. Women who think for themselves. I didn’t want to be a housewife collecting the eggs from the chickens and carrying a baby.” You shake your head, “I want to know why you didn’t let me risk my life in the woods. Why did you pay my brother for me?” You deflect his questions about the books and the dresses.

“I protect what is mine.” Max’s fangs flash in the light and he almost growls that protectively. You tense up and he senses that he might have been too intense so he relaxes and shrugs his wings. “I paid because you were honest about stealing from me.” He snorts. “Have to hand it to you, not many people tell the truth. They lie to save their necks.” He sighs. “Gold doesn’t mean anything to me. I would have paid whatever you demanded.”

You accept his answer. He has no reason to lie. Not when he has you in his home. “I had no motivation to lie to you. Not when you could’ve killed us.” You tilt your head, wondering what he looked like as a human. “So what is it you want from me?” You ask and he sighs, “I want you to get to know me. Not the beast. Me.” He confesses and you frown, “that’s all? You don’t want anything physical? Most men would want…more.”

“If you were offering, I wouldn’t say no.” Max snorts. “You are a gorgeous creature that deserves to be worshiped, but I don’t think that you would want my touch.” He knows how you view him. You’ve screamed and fainted enough to give him that clue. “I am not that kind of monster. I could coerce you into my bed with a simple look, but that is not what I want. So, I would like you to just spend time with me. Talk with me.”

You stare at him, wondering for a moment if he’s tricking you and you wonder what he means about a single look but you nod, “very well. I can talk to you.” You assure him even if he terrifies you. Human men would’ve taken advantage by now so you feel a little more comfortable that he isn’t going to harm you. “Good. Let’s, uh, talk.” He says awkwardly, clearly not having anticipated your conversation lasting this long. You walk over to the bookshelf, caressing the spines of several books, “why do you have so many books?”

“I like to read.” He snorts, as if it should be obvious. “I enjoy learning about different places, different things.”

You turn to look at him, “they aren’t organized.” You observe and he shrugs again, “I get lazy about putting them back.” You shake your head, “an unorganized library is like an unorganized mind. You’ll never find anything. You must ensure the books are in the right place.” You tell him, “you have to take care of things otherwise you’ll lose them to time.”

He smirks but on his face looks more wicked than anything. “Then why don’t you organize it for me?” He asks, making your eyes blow wide in surprise. “What?” You shake your head but he nods. “It’s perfect. You can see what books I have and then add any that you see that I am missing to the collection.”

You huff, looking around at the ridiculous amount of books that are in random piles, “it will take forever.” You whine slightly even though you like the idea. Max chuckles, “we have forever, sweetheart.” You tilt your head at his wording but nod, “I wouldn’t mind spending my days in here.” You confess, “and seeing as I’m not going anywhere, I’ll accept the task.”

“Perfect!” He claps his hands together, his talons clinking together and he grins again. “It will be good to have it cleaned up. The servant can help too.” He wrinkles his nose when he notices how dusty everything is. “Just because I’m a beast doesn’t mean we have to live like it, right? Or you live, I don’t breathe.” He jokes.

“You don’t - you don’t breathe?” You ask and he nods, “what exactly are you?” You inquire, curious as you step away from the book shelf towards him. He flashes his fangs, “I’m a vampire.” You inhale sharply, knowing he could kill you without you even knowing it. “I didn’t know - how did you become-” You gesture to his form, “this?”

He growls slightly, the grin slipping down into a frown. “It was a dark, stormy night.” He tells you dramatically. “An old witch knocked on the door and asked to come inside. I refused her and she attacked me, biting my neck and cursing me.” He explains. “When I changed, she told me that I would stay like this until….” He breaks off and looks towards the west wing of the house. “Until I had learned my lesson.” He finished lamely, not wanting you to pity him or pretend to love him. It wouldn’t work.

Your eyes widen at the story, “and what lesson are you supposed to learn?” You inquire and he snarls slightly, “it doesn’t matter.” You nod and reach for a book to occupy your hands, “so how long have you been like this?” You want to know his story, it will help you understand why you’re a prisoner in his castle.

“One the eve of the new year, it will have been one hundred years since I have taken a breath.” Max tells you, thinking about the rose upstairs. He knows that he is running out of time, but he hopes that you will be the one to break the curse. The staff is already whispering about it in the hallways, as if he couldn’t hear them.

“One hundred - oh my goodness.” You gasp, shocked that the beast in front of you is over a century old. “And the staff?” You ask and he nods, “they are frozen in time with me.” You are struggling to process this. So much has happened within the past day so your mind whirls until he steps back, “I know I’m a monster but I would like you to enjoy living in my home.” He says and you nod, “it appears this is my new home. It’s beautiful. I am struggling to realize that you are - wow. I am sorry that this happened to you.”

He softens at your kindness and if he could, he would be blushing. “Would you like to order some tea while we get started?” He asks. He won’t drink anything, but you might like something. Mrs. Smith had told him that you had been scarfing down the food like you weren’t used to proper meals. He wants you to be comfortable and happy here with him. “And some sweets?”

You raise your eyebrows at him, “Mr. Phillips, are you trying to bribe me?” You ask and he stammers, “well no. I am trying to be a good host and I-” You giggle as he loses his confidence for a moment and you pick up a book, “I’m joking. I would love some tea and sweets. I must confess that my brother and I haven’t been blessed with ample food.” You admit and Max walks over to ring the bell, “you’ll have whatever you want here.” His words make your stomach twist and you nod, inspecting the book, “thank you.”

The silence settles between the two of you and Max feels almost shy. It’s been a long time since anyone has just been in the same room as him, besides the servants. They were used to his gruesome visage but it seems that you either pretend he is not there or feel more comfortable as you start to sort books into growing piles.

****

Weeks later, Max lounges on a chair, watching you as you take a sip of your customary tea. Since that first visit to the library, every time you are here, there is a pot of tea waiting and some small treat for you to nibble on. You have grown even more beautiful, flourishing with proper meals and rest. Your eyes are fixed on the page of the book and he leans forward when you start to read to him again.

You have softened towards Max in the past few weeks. He has let you have your space and you have spent your days organizing his library. You have come to know him more, listening to his comments on different books and his jokes that made you giggle even if you rolled your eyes. He may look like a monster but you have come to know him as the man he was. “So you weren’t married before your change?” You ask as you sip your tea and he snorts, “I was an asshole. I was vain, cocky, and I couldn’t conceive considering someone else’s happiness.” He confesses and you set your tea cup down, “well, now you consider my happiness by making sure I have enough sweets to rot my teeth.” You tease, picking up the small cake.

He chuckles. “Call it envy.” He hums. “I cannot eat sweets anymore and I used to love them.” He recalls fondly. “So watching you enjoy them is the next best thing.” He doesn’t add that your blood smells sweeter and is intoxicating to him. He doesn’t want to scare you when you are starting to become more at ease with him.

You offer him a sweet smile, knowing that he’s telling the truth. He may look beastly but he’s funny and very smart. You’ve spent days discussing literature and he doesn’t dismiss your opinions as “frivolous thoughts of a silly woman” but he listens intently and has a discussion with you. “I was thinking about taking a walk around the gardens.” Max says after you finish the cake. “Would you like to join me? I can show you the roses that the gardener prides himself on.” He says and you nod, “I’d love that.”

He’s both surprised and delighted that you will talk with him. Despite the rumors that vampires are allergic to the sun, he has no problem walking around during the day. He stands and offers you his arm as you brush any crumbs carefully off your lap. “Shall we?”

You take his arm and his form doesn’t scare you like it did before. You know he’s not going to kill you but he could with a flick of his wrist. You always thought vampire myths detailed them keeping their human form but Max is different. He can walk in the sun. You make your way outside and you breathe in the fresh air. “Your gardens are beautiful. It’s a shame people cannot come and see them.”

Max sighs. “If the people knew what I am, they would kill me.” He looks around and sees the flowers blooming in the freshly fallen snow. It’s a rarity, but the gardener had perfected the art of growing flowers in the winter. One hundred years of practice makes perfect. You shiver slightly, not wearing a wrap and Max unfolds one wing to wrap around your shoulders. “I should have insisted on you wearing a coat.” He chides himself. “I don’t feel the cold.”

You know you should be terrified of him but you can’t find it in you. Not when he’s shown you nothing but kindness since that first night. You live in luxury, getting to read books and paint instead of breaking your back doing laundry for the townsfolk. “I’m okay.” You promise and lean closer to him. “It’s too beautiful to go back inside and get a coat.” You insist and grip his arm a little tighter.

He preens slightly, his back straightening and his other wing ruffles slightly. Proudly puffing his chest out as he continues to take you around the garden. Explaining what the gardener had done and how he had managed to keep flowers growing all year long. “Since I am so ugly now, I love having beautiful things around me. Flowers, women.” He teases, winking at you when you look up at him.

You playfully roll your eyes even though your stomach clenches. He may look grotesque but he isn’t as bad as he looks. He can be sweet even if he can be harsh at times. His sarcasm makes you snort and his jokes make you laugh. “I haven’t seen any other women that aren’t servants.” You hum and he says softly, “because I only want the most beautiful woman in the world in my home.” You look at him at that moment, his yellow eyes sincere and your heart flutters. You’re silent but leaning closer, driven by the emotional tidal wave inside you. “Master Phillips. Master Phillips.” Corbin calls out and you immediately move back from Max, turning to the older portly man as he rushes over to Max.

****

You return to your room and spend your time reading until Mrs. Smith and Mrs Delacroix enter your rooms. “Miss. We must dress you. The master has requested your presence at a ball.” Mrs. Smith grins and your eyes widen, “a ball? Is anyone else invited?” Mrs. Smith shakes her head and you swallow, “just us. Wow. I don’t have anything to wear.” You admit and Mrs. Delacroix smirks, “oh don’t worry, mademoiselle, I have the perfect dress for you.” The two older women grin and you nod, nervous for a dance with Max. You are dressed and soon making your way to the ballroom, your heart pounding and you enter the landing for the large staircase that leads down to the ballroom dance floor.

Max is standing in the middle of the ballroom floor, resplendent in a suit that was custom made to fit around his wings. He had scrubbed and slicked his hair back, shined his fangs until they gleamed and tried to trim his talons but they had just grown back. In his hand, he holds one yellow rose, to match the gown that Mrs. Delacroix had fitted to your gorgeous body. He swears his heart would start beating when you appear and give him a shy smile as you descend the steps and he moves forward to meet you. “You are the angel to my devil.” He murmurs softly, taking your hand and kissing the back of it.

He looks so handsome, his yellow eyes taking in your gown and you smile, “thank you. You are the devil in disguise.” You promise, “you look good, Max. Really good.” You inhale deeply and the smell of his cologne hits your senses. “For you.” He holds the rose out and you soften even more, taking the flower and smelling it. “You are spoiling me.”

“Not yet,” he chuckles as he guides you over to the long, formal table that could seat twenty five, but there are just two place settings amongst the platters of pies and tarts, roasts and gravy. It is a banquet that would rival a king’s table. He pulls out your chair and pushes it in for you, before sitting down across from your seat. “Eat.” He orders softly. 

You feel guilty having so much food for just you but you know Max likes extravagance. You dig in eagerly, knowing your days could be numbered here but you haven’t felt in danger since that first night in the castle. “You have an eternity, right?” You ask Max who taps his fingers on the table cloth, “in a way, yes.” He hopes he doesn’t have an eternity stuck like this. “What will you do with an eternity?” You inquire, wondering if he has plans.

Max’s eyes slide away for a moment, looking up towards the ceiling at the west wing and he sighs. “I don’t know.” He admits quietly. “I have already been lonely for so long, I don’t want to think about what will happen when eons pass by and I’m still here.” You tilt your head curiously. “You can go anywhere you want, can’t you?” You ask and he shakes his head, “the curse keeps me bound to my lands. I cannot leave beyond its borders.” He reveals, knowing that he is giving you a chance to escape if you want to, but he is hoping that you will stay. 

Your heart breaks for him and you reach out to touch his hand, “I hope you can break the curse.” You don’t ask him how that’s accomplished because you don’t want to torture him if the curse is something that cannot be broken easily. “Me too.” He says, his eyes burning into yours and he squeezes your hand just as the music begins to play. You turn to look over your shoulder as a small band made up of servants convenes in the corner.

It looks like you have eaten your fill, if not, you can always come back to it. Pushing his chair back, Max stands and holds out his hand to you. “Dance with me, beauty,” he croons softly, hoping you take his hand. When he was a human, he had attended many dances and was good at it. Hopefully his abilities as a vampire will only improve those skills. 

You take his hand, your heart fluttering as you stand up and he escorts you to the center of the ballroom. The band continues to play and you let him pull you close and you grip his shoulder and his hand. “I am not the best dancer.” You confess, “never really had a need to dance in the taverns.”

Max smiles a toothy grin. “No one here will judge you.” He promises before he steps into the dance and sweeps you along with him. You gasp and hold onto his shoulder tighter, making him chuckle as he starts to twirl you around the large ballroom, your skirts swishing along with the two of you as you dance.

You are shocked by how good a dancer Max is. Guiding you around the ballroom for a few songs until your thirst takes over. “I need a drink.” You announce and Max rushes over to fetch you a glass of water. “Thank you.” You lean in to kiss his cheek and you swear he blushes. “Tonight has been magical.” You sigh, glancing back at the quartet and you turn back to Max who has a soft look in his eye.

“It has.” He could compel you, but it wouldn’t break the spell. Plus it would be a hollow victory if you were to fall into his arms. You give him the sweetest smile, one that shows him that you see past his monstrous face but Max still steps forward slowly. “I want to kiss you.” He growls softly, reaching for your waist to pull you gently towards him. Giving you ample opportunity to turn him away. “Will you let me?” He remembers what you said about most men just wanting more and he doesn’t want you to feel like he is forcing you.

His face is monstrous but you see his soul, the kindness hiding beneath the hue of his yellow eyes. He claims to be selfish and mean but you have found him to be giving and kind. He is capable of so much more. You want him to kiss you. You nod, knowing he could kill you with a flick of his wrist but he’s only protected you. You tilt your head as his hand comes up to cup your cheek, his talons long but you’re not scared as his lips press against yours.

He takes it slow, keeping the kiss light and not pressing it further until your lips move. You change the angle of the kiss and Max growls. He still doesn’t take over, but he opens up and he feels your shiver when the edge of your tongue touches his fang, making him groan. It’s so innocent yet bold, spreading a warmth through his chest as he tightens his grip on you slightly and lets his own tongue touch against yours.

Your hands slide up his chest, gently gripping his suit jacket as you deepen the kiss, your tongue sliding against his and you gasp when his fang cuts your tongue and your drops of your blood spill into his mouth.

Max growls, feeling the need to taste you nearly overwhelming him, but he doesn’t attack you. Yanking his head away, his eyes are dark yellow, even more vivid than before.

You gasp when he pulls back to look at you, “I’m sorry.” He says and you shake your head, “it’s okay. I want - I want you to kiss me again.” You demand, your eyes wide and your chest heaving.

Your teeth are coated in the pink hue of your tongue but it makes Max even more ravenous as he swoops down to capture your lips again. It’s only a pity that it’s not enough blood to break the curse, and he isn’t convinced you love him yet. His tongue slides into your mouth eagerly and he crushes you against him, taking care not to hold you too tight.

You moan into his mouth, your hands sliding up to cup his cheeks, distorted beneath your touch and you slide your tongue against his, letting him taste you. The band stops playing and quietly leaves the ballroom, leaving you and Max to yourselves.

“I have to stop here.” Max confesses, hard and throbbing but he has pulled away from you again. “I do not wish to push you any farther than you would like to go and I can feel myself losing control.” He confesses. “I would never hurt you.” He adds. “I would make you scream in pleasure, but never fear.”

You have never been with a man but you want Max. You shouldn’t because he’s a beast but you see the kindness in his eye towards you. You want him to touch you. “I want you, Max. I don’t care that you are a vampire. I want you to take me to your bed. I’ve never thought - you would be the first.” You confess, biting your lip.

Max searches your eyes, looking for any hint of doubt and he finds none. His blood seemingly boils in his veins at your confession, making his passions undeniable. He scoops you up in his arms, and in the blink of an eye, you are transported to the west wing of the house. To his bedroom that had been previously forbidden for you to enter.

You shriek at the movement and you find yourself in a room you’ve never been in before. You gasp at the heavy drapes and painting that cover the room and near the window is a rose, sparkling and covered by glass. You don’t get a chance to ask about it as he spins you to press his lips to yours.

His talons almost shred the dress off your body but he tries to be gentle. Desperate to feel your skin and taste your warmth. He wants to give you the most pleasure you have only ever dreamed of. To show you that he can make you feel things that no one else can. Groaning softly when he caresses your back, he tugs the dress down to let it pool at your feet; your undergarments and your slippers the only thing you are wearing.

You step out of the dress, his hands all over your body and you reach for his cravat, pulling it loose and you toss it onto the floor so you can work on removing his shirt, untying it. “I want you, Max.” You plead, knowing he’s monstrous but you see the man beneath.

“You have me.” He promises, his talons are less careful with his own clothes. Hearing the fabric rip as he tries to get out of them so you can touch him as you wish to. His body is much like his face, human-like, but he is harder and more muscular than a human might ever dream of being, hard planes and sinewy under thick skin.

You gasp at the exposed skin and you slide your hands down his chest, noticing the lack of a heartbeat. “Max.” You moan when he leans in to kiss along your neck. He doesn’t bite you and you’re grateful for that, feeling his fangs scrap your skin as his hands grip your ass.

“Beautiful angel.” He groans softly, loving how sweet and warm you are. How you shiver against his cooler skin and your fingers caressing his chest feel like you are branding him with your touch. “Let me explore you.” He kisses your pulse and smiles when it jumps. “Taste you. Lick your sweet, untouched cunt and see if you will scream my name.” 

His words make you wet and you nod, letting him guide you to the large bed in the middle of the room. You moan when he kisses down your chest as you lay down on the bed. “Max.” You sigh, “touch me.”

Permission granted, Max starts to strip you of the thin layer keeping your body from his gaze. Hungry for you, he can smell the arousal that heats your cunt and he growls possessively, monstrous claws holding your thighs apart to look down at the thick thatch of hair that protects your sex and his tongue swipes across his fangs. Ravenous for you, he hooks your knees under his hands and lifts them up to his shoulders and he bends down, your feet perched on his wings as he dives into your cunt. 

Your cry echoes in the bedroom as his tongue slides through your folds. You’ve never felt anything like it and your hand immediately finds his hair, pulling to push him further into your flesh. “Oh my God, Max.” You moan, tilting your head back as your heart thumps.

You aren’t pushing him away. Instead you are arching your back and pulling him closer. Wanting more from the beast that he is. HIs growl of approval vibrates through your core and he laps at your clit before moving down to push his monstrous tongue into your wet heat, wanting to taste you from the source as he grinds his hips into the bed. 

Your chest heaves as he makes you feel things you’ve never felt before. You whimper when he curls his tongue deep inside you, pushing against that spot that makes your heart pound and your stomach twist. “Fuck.” You curse, unable to help yourself.

He huffs, amused and enthralled by the curse that falls from your sweet lips. His yellow eyes are fixed on your face, watching your reactions as he continues to devour you. You are so sweet, even your taste is like the cakes and candies that he used to enjoy before he had been changed. He could become addicted to you. 

His tongue curls deep and his nose presses against your clit. “Oh God.” You pant, eyes squeezed shut as he pushes you higher and higher. “I am - I’ve never felt like this before.” You confess breathlessly. He chuckles at your confession, knowing that you couldn’t have felt this way when you’ve never had anyone - man or beast - between your thighs. Growling softly as he nudges his nose against the little button of pleasure above your entrance while he works his tongue deeper and deeper inside you. 

His tongue makes you see stars and you’re pushed over the edge within moments, your body tensing as you flood his tongue with your pleasure. You’ve never felt like that and your fingers tangle in his hair as you take what he gives you.

Your juices are just as addictive as blood. Making Max greedy as he slurps it down, working you through the first orgasm  you have received by another until your thighs are shaking and your feet are pressing into his wings. 

You gasp, struggling to try and get oxygen as he steals the breath from you with his mouth on your cunt. “Max. Max. I - oh God.” You whine when it becomes too much to handle. “I want to kiss you.” You demand, wanting to taste yourself on his lips.

He crawls up your body, his eyes fixed on yours and the monstrous planes of his face make him look evil. Like he is about to devour you, but he only wants to possess you and make you cry by giving you another round of breathtaking pleasure. Following your orders and kissing you as soon as he can reach your lips.

 You slide your tongue against his, moaning into his mouth as your tang hits your tongue from his. Your hands slide up his stomach and you reach around to caress his wings, loving the way they flutter beneath your touch.

Max is still wearing his trousers, his cock straining against the seam and he reaches between the two of you, his claws slicing through the fabric to rip them off in his eagerness to free his length.

You slide your hands down his body, gasping when your fingers wrap around his hard length and you’re shocked at how big he is. You’ve seen naked men washing in your village and you never imagined feeling a man so large. “Max.” You plead, “tell me what to do.”

“Put me right at your entrance, Angel.” He groans and rocks his hips forward. “Tell me that I can slide inside you. That I can feel you around me.”

“Yes. Yes. I want you inside me.” You plead, feeling him shift so you can position him at your entrance. You’re dripping wet for him and you slide the head through your folds. “Take me, Max.” You beg, “I want to feel you inside me.”

You would be so easy to convince right now. Teasing you with his cock as he begs to drink your blood. You are desperate enough that you would consider it, probably letting him. Still he doesn’t. Instead, he slides his tongue into your mouth as he feels his cock notch at your entrance and he starts to slowly push inside you.

You grip his shoulders near his wings as he pushes slowly into you, his tongue caressing yours and you wince slightly at the sting when he pushes deeper and you try to relax to take him.

He feels how tight you are, despite him working to make sure you are wet and ready for him. He slowly rocks his hips and his wings unfurl in pleasure when you clench down around him.

“Max.” You cry as he pushes deep and he’s fully inside you. There’s a brief moment of pain but it fades when he kisses along your neck and allows you to adjust to him. “Oh God.” You pant, lifting your legs higher up on his hips.

You are perfect. Your sweet innocence is now taken by him, a monster. Yet you are whimpering for him to move and he waits still, wanting you to adjust to the feeling before he pulls his hips back.

He twitches inside you and you beg him to move and finally, he concedes. He rocks his hips and you close your eyes, head tilted back as you let him take your innocence. He's incredible and you see past the terror of his looks to see the man beneath.

Max tries to keep his pace slow, to build up to the frantic pace his own body is demanding. The tight heat of your cunt just makes him want to destroy you, to take everything you will give him and rail you into the bed. With his strength, that could kill you, so he holds himself back. Still, you moan every time he’s rocking back into your body.

You cling to him as he thrusts into you. Your mouth opens as he makes you feel things you’ve never felt before. You moan and he smirks, “so tight for me.” You caress his back, his wings fluttering around you as he fucks you.

Max pushes his arms around your body, lifting you up off the bed as he continues to push in and out of your body, his wings flapping to keep you hovering above the sheets you were just writhing in.

You gasp in surprise and you clench around him. Your stomach twists and you’re getting closer. His talons dig into your flesh a little and you fall over the edge. His cock pushes deep and you cry out, clamping down on his cock as he makes you feel things you’ve never felt before.

Max throws his head back and growls, nearly a roar as he pushes deep. His seed is useless, but it paints your walls with thick, shuddering pulses as he follows you over the edge of bliss.

You cling to him, letting him work himself inside your body, and you sigh in bliss when he lays you back down on the sheets. “Max.” You whisper, a soft smile on your face as you open your eyes to look at him.

Max knows that he loves you. His heart would be pounding wildly if it still beat. He leans and gently kisses your lips, still buried inside you but he cannot stay there forever. Slowly, he pulls out of you and folds his wings down so he can against your body on his side. “How do you feel?”

“Perfect.” You murmur, curling into his side. You feel adored and relaxed, riding high on the pleasure from him. You caress his chest, lacking a heartbeat but you’re certain he can hear yours pounding in your chest. You close your eyes and breathe him in, “how - was it good for you?” You ask, curious and a little nervous.

“It was…..” Max tries to find a word to accurately describe it. “Beautiful.” He decides, his long digits slowly dragging up and down your side with his talons curled in so he doesn’t hurt you. “Just like you are.” He smiles. “Now we will have more to do than just read together in the library.”

You grin, kissing his chest as he curls around you, and you sigh, loving how good he’s made you feel. “I definitely want to do this again.” You hum and he chuckles, kissing your forehead, “I’ve created a monster.” You giggle at the wording and you yawn, suddenly exhausted by the way your body aches from the new movements. “Sleep.” Max orders, happy to hold you in his arms all night. You nod and snuggle into his side as he pulls the covers over you.

Max doesn’t sleep much, another effect of the curse. Instead he watches as you sleep, knowing that he has to tell you how he feels. Show you how he feels. He wants this curse to be broken so he can spend a real life with you. To take you to see the world and to experience how it has changed over the last one hundred years. You have talked of wanting to go on adventures and he will take you on them.

****

 The morning after, Max was very sweet, reluctantly letting you go so you could wash and change for breakfast. He sits and watches you eat your morning meal while he sips a cup of blood - a sight you’ve gotten used to. He offers you a bloody smile every so often that makes you giggle and he chuckles, loving to make you laugh. After breakfast, you go for a walk and Max tells you about the history of his home, how it spans back generations and how his parents taught him to manage the estate. “I was spoiled. Selfish. A blood sucking bastard. I didn’t deserve such a fine home and I know that is why I was cursed. I was horrible.” He admits and you rub his arm, “but you’ve learned and surely that gets you closer to breaking the curse.”

“Hopefully I am closer than ever before.” Max admits, pausing in the gardens to turn towards you. “You are so beautiful.” He murmurs again, reaching out to cup your cheek and he is struck by the contrast between his taloned hand and your gentle human body. “Angel, I-“ there is a crash from around the hedges and Max instantly changes, fangs on display and growling protectively at any threat that might harm you.

You gasp as Max shoves you behind him and you peek around him, eyes wide as you see your brother. “Max. No. It’s - it’s my brother.” You pat Max on the back and he lets you step around him. Your brother rushes forward to hug you, pulling you close. “You’re okay.” He gasps, kissing your hair. “I’m better than okay.” You promise, “I’ve been treated like royalty.” You admit and your brother looks over at Max with raised eyebrows. “He - he’s a monster.” Your brother frowns and you shake your head, “he’s not.” Your brother sighs, “you need to come home. I - I will give back the coins. I cannot let you stay here with a monster. Not when father has returned. I think - he’s dying. He cannot walk and his speech is slurring.” Your brother confesses and you sigh, knowing your alcoholic father would come back one day to the cottage you called home.

Max scowls but he relaxes when he recognizes your brother, unhappy that the man is here and demanding that you leave. He sees the hesitation in your refusal and knows that you want to leave him. Despite how he has treated you, despite everything he has given you, you don’t love him. He should have known you could never love a monster.

You don’t want to leave but your father is dying. You must say goodbye to him and get his affairs in order. You turn to look at Max, knowing he is the one who decides if you leave or if you stay. “My father is dying. He’s not a good man but I must say goodbye for my own peace of mind.” You say to Max, hoping he lets you go do this. “I’ll come back.” You promise even though you doubt he will believe you.

His heart breaks, knowing that by the time you come back, it will be too late. The last petals of the rose will have fallen and the curse will be permanent. His heart shatters, but he arches a brow and ruffles his wings as if he is completely unaffected. “Leave.” He commands dismissively. “Do not bother to return. I have already gotten what I craved from you.” He lies cruelly, lashing out in his own hurt.

Your heart twists at the way his frown furrows and his expression hardens, his words piercing your heart that thumps for him. “You - you didn’t?” Your brother chokes and you stiffen your back, “it doesn’t matter. Let’s go.” You demand and your brother wraps his around you to guide you through the gardens to his horse. Max watches until you disappear and he doesn’t see the tears on your cheeks as you walk away from the man you love.

A loud roar scatters the birds that had started to come around the castle again, sending them into the skies. Max uncurls his wings and shoots up into the air, desperate to hunt and drain the life of something to feed himself and rip it to shreds.

****

You return to your village and you enter the cottage to find your father in bed, his brow beaded with sweat and you know he’s dying. “Papa.” You call to him and kneel down beside him. “You’re here.” Your father smiles and reaches for your hand, “I’m here, papa.” You promise, a sad smile on your face.

“I am sorry.” He groans. “I was not the father I should have been. Losing your mother changed me.” He has had time to reflect on his mistakes and these are the ones he regret most bitterly. “Find love, my sweet daughter. Settle for nothing more than a man who would give you everything.”

You caress his cheek, knowing he could’ve been a better father but he let himself get lost in the ale after your mother died suddenly. “I have found love, papa. He’s everything I want. I love him.” You confess and your father squeezes your hand, “then go to him.” He urges, coughing moments later and you choke when his grip goes slack.

His last thoughts on this earth are of your mother; of the joy of knowing that you are loved and will be cared for. Your brother shuffles behind you. “You cannot return to that monster.” He hisses. “He let you go.”

You turn to your brother, your eyes watery and you shake your head, “he let me go because I- I needed to be here. I want to go back. He’s not a monster, he’s a good man.” You argue and your brother shakes his head, “he’s a beast. He will kill you.” You scoff, wiping your cheeks, “he made me feel protected and valued. He listened to me. Gave me whatever I wanted. I wish to return to him and there’s nothing you can do to stop me. I love you but I am in love with him.” You declare and your brother is shocked. He’s never heard you speak like this. “Then go.” He demands, waving at you, “go back to him.” You stand up, rushing to your brother to kiss his cheek before you run outside to your horse. You quickly saddle him and swing your leg over, your dress flowing out behind you as you make your way back to Max.

The bedroom is trashed, the bed splintered to pieces and the furniture destroyed. The only thing that remains untouched in the room is the table with the enchanted rose. The single petal hanging precariously on as Max sulks in the shadows. “Sir!” The door bursts open and Corbin hustles into the room. “We are under attack!” He cries, but even that does nothing to stir Max from his depression. “Let them come.” He grunts, turning away from the servant and staring out the window in the direction he had last seen you from.

You find out as you approach the castle that your brother had told every man who ventured into the tavern in the village that the castle in the forest was piled high in gold and silver and a monster resides there. You ride harder, desperate to get to Max and you see your landlord leading the charge into the castle. Gold and silver are carried away in the men’s hands as they pillage and you run through the castle after leaving your horse outside. “Max!” You yell, trying to find the man you love.

Max lets the men take what they want, the servants are down in the passageways under the castle, safe behind a trick door but he doesn’t leave his room. Not paying attention to anything, not even the door creaking open as he stares out the window still.

You rush through the castle, pushing past the men who are carrying whatever their pockets will handle. “Well, well, well. This is the beast her brother was crowing about. I have to say, you’re hardly a beast when you live in luxury. If I was you, I’d be fucking whatever I could and living it up.” The landlord, Louis, grins as he holds the gun in his hand, pointing it towards Max.

“Just take what you want and go.” Max barely cuts his eyes towards the man standing in his room. The gun isn’t a threat he is concerned about and he won’t fight the man. You are gone and he will be this way forever, so it doesn’t matter.

“It’s not gold that I want.” Louis declares, “you have something that’s more precious. Someone.” He says your name, “you stole her from me. I wanted her, asked her to marry me and the next thing I know her brother is screaming about a beast who has taken his sister. Then she returns and says the beast isn’t a beast. He’s a man and her eyes…she looks like she’s in love.” Louis scoffs, “you have what is mine. She will never be with me if you are alive.”

“She doesn’t love me.” Max snorts. “I am a beast. I sent her away.” He hates how he had just a glimmer of hope because of his words. “Do not make me kill you.” He warns. “I just want to be left in peace.”

“I cannot allow you to live. Not if she has a glimmer of hope to be with you. I shall kill you and I’ll console the poor girl. I did my research. I have wooden bullets.” He chuckles and Max growls, standing up to face the man, “I told you to leave me the fuck a-” He doesn’t finish his sentence as Louis fires the gun just as you rush across the room and push the man to the floor with all of your strength.

Max sees you, hears your scream right as the wooden bullet pierces his skin. Making him groan out and collapse to the floor, feeling physical pain for the first time since he had been cursed and feeling the blood in his body start to pool under him. He moans your name. “You came.”

Louis chuckles and you scramble off of him, rushing over to Max who chokes on his blood. “No no no no.” You cry, cupping his cheeks, “please don’t die. Please.” You beg, leaning in to kiss his cheek. “Don’t go, Max.” You plead as his eyes flutter, more blood pooling beneath him and staining your skirts. He chokes and you can’t understand him, it’s more of a gurgle. “Please.” You whimper as his eyes close, “I love you. Please don’t go. I love you.” You sob, your hands cupping his cheeks and you don’t realize it but you cut your wrist on Louis’s knife when you pushed him down. Your blood trickles down your palm and onto Max’s cheek, trailing along to his mouth as you lean over him, crying for the loss of your love.

In the glass case, the last petal on the rose falls off and flutters to the bottom. The time is up.

Max goes still and his eyes close, silence falling over the room making your sobs sound even louder. Louis watches, believing that he has won and will be able to drag you away from the beast’s body. Not noticing the small flickers of light starting to dance around both you and the body. Not until a giant ball of light seems to glow out of the monster's chest and he starts to rise from the ground, making you gasp as you are pushed upright.

You watch Max rise into the air, the light engulfing him and you scramble back, eyes wide at the scene in front of you. You swallow harshly, tears on your cheeks and you wince when the light beams until it starts to fade and you see a man standing in the place where Max once stood. You frown, standing on shaky legs as you walk towards the man, his eyes now brown and soft, his hair dark and short but his features are familiar to you. “Max?” You choke, recognizing the beast who is now human.

It takes him a moment, staring down at his hands and then feeling his chest and face, feeling his hair before he chokes out a laugh and grabs your hands to say your name. “It’s me!” He laughs again. “You broke the curse! I- I’m me again.” Crushing you against him, he presses his lips to yours without the presence of fangs.

You wrap your arms around his neck, grinning against his lips as you pull back to look at him, “it’s you. Oh my God.” You laugh, ridiculously happy for him to be alive and the curse of be broken. “Wait. How is - the curse? How is it broken?” You ask, brow furrowed.

Max shoots you a guilty look. “I had to drink your blood.” He frowns when he realizes that means you are injured and pulls back to examine your hands and tutting when he sees the cut.

You look down at the injury and you gasp, not even realizing you were cut. Louis growls, pissed off that his plan failed but as he raises his gun again, he is whacked over the head by Corbin with a metal tray. Louis falls to the floor but you pay him no mind. “Why didn’t you just ask me? I would’ve given you my blood if it meant your curse being broken.” You tut and Max sighs, “because it doesn’t work like that. It only works if you love me.” You shake your head, a soft smile on your face. “The curse is broken. Did you not hear me say it? I love you, Max. I loved you as a beast and I love you as you are now. I don’t care about your looks, I love you. Who you are inside.” You promise, cupping his cheek.

“But you cannot tell me that I do not look better now.” He huffs, leaning in to kiss you again. His heart jolts in his chest and his eyes widen, gasping into the kiss. “My heart!” He grabs your hand and holds it over the wildly beating muscle. “This is all for you, Angel.”

“Your haircut is better.” You tease and he chuckles, his chest moving beneath your palm. You feel his heartbeat and you lean in to kiss him again, “mine is yours.” You promise and he nudges his nose against yours. The staff come rushing through the doors, excited cries of relief that their years of being frozen in time are over. “I knew she was the one.” Mrs. Smith proclaims and the others nod as Max caresses your cheek while he stares lovingly into your eyes.

“I love you.” He murmurs softly. “You saved me from my fate as the beast that no one could love.” His thumb strokes your cheek. “We will be married as soon as we can have the party.” He decides, grinning at you. “And we will live happily ever after.”

You nod, knowing you want to spend the rest of your life with him. “I love you.” You murmur, kissing him again as he pulls you close. 

**** 

“You may now kiss the bride!” The priest declares even though Max has already surged forward to press his lips to yours. The castle is decorated and the villagers are in attendance as well as the servants, all excited to witness Max and his bride be married. Max is soon sweeping you onto the dance floor and you grip his arms as he twirls you around. He is devastatingly handsome but he’s softer, not the bitter beast he was. He is happy and giving and kind even if he’s sarcastic at times. You adore him and you can’t wait to spend your life with him. 

“Are you ready for happily ever after?” You ask Max and he offers you a beautiful grin, “with you? I was ready from the night you broke into my house.” He smirks and you snort, “that was my brother.” You look over at your brother who is smiling and speaking with the maid who is blushing at his flirtations. “So you weren’t trying to steal, but you ended up stealing my heart.” He declares and you giggle softly, making him grin to have made you laugh. “And ended up taming the beast.” You counter and Max grins, oblivious to anyone but you. The beauty who tamed the beast and broke the vampiric curse of Max Phillips

[kxtsukixoxo]

pro!hero dynamight is known for his explosive nature, fans second guessing if they should really approach the hothead. is it really surprising when you aren’t scared of him?

𝗦𝗘𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗦 ᥫ᭡ 𝗣𝗥𝗘𝗩 ᥫ᭡ 𝗡𝗘𝗫𝗧

katsuki hadn’t felt nervous before, in his entire life. if you would ask him what it feels like to be queasy, he wouldn’t be able to answer the question. but this afternoon? he felt his guts twist and turn, acrobatically. 

why did he need the approval of a barely two year old boy? maybe because he was your two year old boy. katsuki wanted the boy to like him, he had to. he made sure to pick up a dynamight plushie for kenji and a fresh bouquet of flowers for you, eager to meet your baby boy. 

he’d come across many kids, during patrol, or even during rescue missions, safely he could confirm, that he knew how to handle a kid, so what was he nervous about?  

katsuki felt the sweat drip off his palms as he walked towards your door, he felt the hair at the back of his neck stand up, second guessing if he should knock or not. repping his knuckles rhythmically against the door twice, he stood pin straight, waiting for the door to crack open. 

and on cue, the handle twisted. revealing you and kenji resting on your shoulder, taking a nap. 

“he’s asleep” you mouthed, scared to wake up the dazed kid. katsuki smiled at the sight of your motherly and nurturing side, watching you pack kenjis backpack, ready to leave. 

“you ready?” katsuki whispered hesitantly, making sure not to wake up kenji. you nodded as you grabbed your belongings. “leave your wallet behind” 

“hey!! you said i could pay this time” 

“don’t scream, you’re gonna wake up the baby” 

you glared at katsuki, watching him smirk while he placed your wallet down. he grabbed your free hand and placed it in his, the action stunning you. 

katsuki had kenji’s bag on his shoulder, while he held your hand, as you two walked to the car. opening the backseats door, to reveal a safety seat. you looked at katsuki, shocked. “what? we can’t have him buckled up without one, it’s a safety hazard.” 

“you could’ve just asked me for-“ 

“i don’t wanna hear it shhh, you’re gonna wake him up” you giggled at the gentleness katsuki displayed with kenji, watching him buckle up your baby, making sure his head wasn’t drooping down “i don’t want his neck to hurt when he wakes up” 

he closed the backseat door, once he was satisfied, and sure that kenji was safe in the backseat. opening the front door, for you. “such a gentleman” you giggled. katsuki grinned, as he clicked your seatbelt in, and made his way to the drivers seat. starting up his engine, making sure not to be too loud, incase he’d wake up the tiny sleeping figure in the backseat, with his thumb in his mouth. the kid was getting drool on the seat, but he couldn’t care less.

‘it hasn’t even been thirty minutes since i met this kid and he’s already got me wrapped around his finger’

the drive to the café was longer than usual, you two spoke about all sorts of things, making sure to catch up. of course you couldn’t explain kenji at the moment, he was in the backseat, drooling on the car that belongs to the man you have a slight crush on. deep in laughter, you heard babbles from the backseat, indicating your son had woken up from his deep slumber. katsuki peeked at kenji through the rearview mirror, finally taking in his features, deep green eyes, clearly he didn’t get that from you, and fluffy navy blue hair.

he didn’t inherit either from you, clearly. obviously taking after his father, however he did have your nose and eye shape, just a bit more round and upturned. he watched you grab, what seemed to be a rattle and hand it to the baby. watching him dangle it and giggle, causing the both of you to chuckle in the front seat.

𝗧𝗔𝗚𝗟𝗜𝗦𝗧 -

@rinkomei @qyuin @kalulakunundrum @amayaaaxx @lotusstarr @mona345 @aryuunachigiri @emmaafinchh @haruesme  @nottherealslimshady @taxavoider @gomu-gomu-gojo 

[refreshingly-original]

Okay, new idea. (This got bigger then I thought it would)

After surviving the Road, Lilia takes on an apprentice reader, who already knows tarot.

She thinks to test her skill and has her do a reading for her.

Her cards are clearly very cheap, misprinted (think image is wonky or partially missing) and of cats.

She thinks they’re a joke, a knock off to be sold for Halloween and says as such.

Reader pays it no mind, fully aware of Lilia’s view on the worlds take on witches, and continues with the reading.

Lilia decides to gift her a new deck, and they’re gorgeous, certainly not misprinted, but every time she see reader doing a reading for herself, or even Teen or Alice when they drop in for a visit, readers using her cat cards.

Lilia thinks she understands, slightly, why she uses them when she starts noticing the stray cats turning up at the back door and following reader around when they go out.

It doesn’t help that reader always toddles off when she sees a cat and goes to pat it. Lilia has lost her apprentice many times because of it and had to track them down.

Eventually, during dinner one night, where reader has a pregnant stray sleeping on her lap, Lilia asks why she still uses the cards.

The cards were a gag gift from her best friend who gave them to her for her sixteenth birthday. She got the cat ones because cats seem to flock to reader like she’s their queen.

Reader says that her friend had crossed out cups on a card and replaced it to say ‘Queen of Cats’.

They were the last gift she’d gotten from her best friend before she was just gone. (Whether she moved for whatever reasons or died is up to you)

And that’s why she still uses them for readings for people she cares about. Cause they’re scuffed to hell and back, but they’re her most important belonging.

Lilia figures out that reader was in love with her best friend and lets it go after that.

But as time goes by, and readers gets closer with the coven and Lilia, she starts using the deck that Lilia gave her for readings for Alice and teen, sometimes even Jen, never Agatha though, and Lilia is glad to see that reader is moving on from the heartbreak, but still says nothing.

It’s not until a year or so has gone since she started using Lilia’s deck on the coven that Lilia sees her doing a reading for herself with the deck she gave her.

That night, she asks for a reading.

Lilia pulls The Lovers and that’s how she realises that she might be in love with the girl.

Reader on the other hand starts teasing her about having a special someone, not realising it’s her. She does so for days afterwards, mentioning it whenever Lilia’s gaze seems to linger a little too long on someone.

“Ohh is that them? Cute.”

“I will hit you.”

“No you won’t. You love me too much.”

“Insufferable girl.”

When they meet up with the coven for dinner night at Agatha’s, reader tells them.

By shouting it from the front door.

“Lilia has a crush on someone!”

Everyone joins in on the questioning and teasing, but Lilia doesn’t miss the look Agatha gives her before glancing at reader.

She knows she’s going to be cornered by the other witch at some point and does her best to not be alone to avoid that.

It doesn’t work.

Agatha convinces Teen to help her get her alone and Lilia falls for it because she has a soft spot for him.

“So-“

“Leave it Harkness.”

“You going to tell her?”

“I’m leaving.”

“I’m almost certain she feels the same for you.”

Lilia ignores it and rejoins the coven, but it lingers in the back of her mind.

A month later, Lilia does her own reading and curses up a storm when she pulls The Lovers again.

Reader peaks over her shoulder and laughs, wrapping her in a hug.

“Maybe you should just tell them.”

“I’m too old for this, baby.”

“Evidently not.”

“Ugh.”

That night, reader also pulls The Lovers and realises what’s happening. At least for her. She realise nothing about Lilia. Oblivious as she is.

Que her bailing to bunk on Alice’s couch that night because ‘how could she move on so fast’ from her first love.

Lilia doesn’t find reader in the morning and tries calling her but it goes ignored. It’s not until Alice rings her and tells her that she’s staying with her for a while that Lilia relaxes. Though she’s still confused about why she’s gone, so she looks around her room, only to spot the spread on the table and of course comes to the conclusion it’s because reader figured out she has feelings for her.

She kind of goes numb for that day, only really focusing on her emotions after she closes up the shop and kinds of breaks down a bit.

She doesn’t open the shop for the next few days, and only answers the phone because she thinks it might be reader.

It’s not. It’s Alice telling her that reader will be staying another night.

Then it’s Jen checking in, because Alice called her and told her that somethings wrong with Lilia.

But of course Alice helps reader through it, pointing out that it’s been years and that it’s okay to fall in love again. After about a week, Alice convinces her to go and talk with Lilia, even promising to be there with her for support.

Jen of course has no problem breaking in to Lilia’s home after a few days of Lilia just hanging up on her as soon as she realises it’s not Alice with an update on reader, to talk some sense into her.

It ends up with them drinking. Jen only has two, but Lilia ends up drunk, so Jen has to take care of her.

Jen doesn’t realise that she sleeps on the Murphy bed and puts her in readers little room. Jen sleeps on the sofa. Shes going to have words with Lilia about not having a better sofa in the morning.

The following morning is when Alice and reader turn up, surprised to see Jen scrunched up on the sofa and no Lilia.

Reader heads up to her room to put her things away, only to stop and stare at Lilia who is silently crying in her bed.

She drops her shit and just crawls in with Lila and holds her.

“Please be real.”

“It’s real, Lilia.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

[buckets-and-trees]

I love bed Chem and the follow up!! I’d love to see them bump into each other outside of hook up times - like they’re both in the same coffee shop…and a cute barista is flirting with reader…and Bucky suddenly feels possessive when he sees it happening from across the shop but can’t say anything as they’re just hook up buds and it’s not his place to be jealous 🤭

Even Better Than In My Head

Characters/Pairings: Bucky Barnes x curvy!Millennial female!reader Word Count: 2.9k Summary: Hooking up with Bucky Barnes in the middle of the night has scratched the itch whenever you're craving between your legs, but crossing paths with the man out in the wild in normal life? Much more dangerous than you could have guessed.

Content Warnings: modern AU, hook up culture/bootycall, established sexual relationship

Author Notes: This is a follow-up to Parking Lot Chem and Camaraderie.

Logistical Notes: My first fill for @buckyboybingo (Gym) and my ninth bit for Valentine Storygrams!

↠ Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest

“This entire table is a masterpiece!” your sister exclaims, thoroughly impressed and overjoyed. “I seriously owe you!”

“You do!” you chide. “You owe me many, many favors.”

“I’d promise my first-born, but that ship has already sailed!” she replies, gesturing at her daughter - your niece - who is currently engaged in some sort of statue tag game with a gaggle of other children her age.

“I’m serious, though. You know you absolutely saved me.”

"I know," you say, waving off her gratitude with a smile. "That's what sisters are for, right?"

You both turn to survey the booth, a riot of pink and red decorations adorning every surface. Heart-shaped cookies, cupcakes with swirling frosting rosettes, raspberry-lemon bars, and delicate palmiers drizzled with white chocolate and heart-shaped sprinkles cover the table in neat, enticing rows.

"Seriously, though," your sister continues, lowering her voice, "this could make or break my campaign for PTA president. The entire board is here, and they're all watching to see how this goes."

You nod, remembering the frantic phone call you'd received two nights ago.

Your sister's voice had been a mix of panic and exhaustion as she explained how her usually angelic toddler had decided to test out his superhero abilities by leaping off the kitchen counter. The result? A nasty gash that required a trip to urgent care and several stitches. But to make matters worse, she’d only been so distracted to allow the failed test-flight of her two-year-old because she’d been trying to figure out why her oven would turn on, but refused to heat up past 180 degrees - nowhere near close enough to take care of her baking needs.

So you agreed - or offered, you really don’t quite remember how this part of the conversation went at this point - to take care of making all the baked goods.

“Couldn't let my favorite sister crash and burn at the Valentine's Day bake sale, could I?"

"I'm your only sister, you goof," she retorts with a laugh. "But again, thank you. I don't know what I would have done without you."

As you're about to respond, your sister's eyes suddenly widen, and a sly grin spreads across her face. She leans in close, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. "Speaking of paying you back, I think I'm about to start right now."

You follow her gaze across the crowded gymnasium, your curiosity piqued. Through the sea of parents and children, a tall figure is making his way towards your booth. As he draws closer, you can't help but notice how he seems to part the crowd effortlessly, his presence commanding yet somehow warm.

"See that absolutely gorgeous man heading our way?" your sister murmurs, her excitement palpable. "That's Aiden Hartley. He's a single dad, a widower, and practically the perfect gentleman."

You try to maintain your composure as Aiden approaches, but it's difficult not to stare. He's easily over six feet with a build that suggests he's no stranger to the gym. His short blonde hair catches the light, looking almost golden under the fluorescent glare of the school's overhead lighting. Even from a distance, you can see his eyes - a striking shade of green that reminds you of summer leaves.

As Aiden reaches your booth, a warm smile spreads across his face. Your heart skips a beat.

"Ladies," he greets you both, his voice deep and smooth. "I have to say, this spread looks absolutely incredible."

Your sister jumps in, "Oh, it's all thanks to my amazing sister here! Aiden, you haven’t met her yet, but she's the baking genius."

Aiden's gaze returns to you, a spark of interest in those mesmerizing green eyes. "Is that so? Well, I'm thoroughly impressed. I'm Carter’s dad, by the way, he’s in the same class as your niece." He extends his hand.

You introduce yourself, hoping your palm isn't too sweaty as you shake his hand. His grip is firm but gentle, and you can't help but notice how your hand seems to fit very nicely into his.

"So, what would you recommend?" Aiden asks, gesturing to the array of sweets.

“I’d like one of the cupcakes,” the last voice you’re expecting to hear interrupts from just behind you, and you whip around to find yourself face to face with Bucky, the man who has been regularly - if intermittently - wrecking you sexually.

What on earth is he doing here?

Not only is he here, he’s looking devastatingly handsome in a dark blue button-down and jeans. Your breath catches in your throat as memories of your late-night encounter flood your mind.

"One of the chocolate ones," Bucky drawls, his eyes roaming over the baked goods before settling on you with a heated gaze. "Is that a strawberry buttercream on top?"

“Mhmm,” you manage to nod, throat completely dry, brain trying to figure out how to function.

You’re not supposed to be seeing this man in the light of day - does not compute, does not compute.

"Looks like someone's been busy in the kitchen," he adds.

Your sister, oblivious to the tension crackling between you and Bucky, beams at him. "Yes! Isn't it amazing? My sister made everything here."

Bucky's lips curl into a smirk. "Is that so? You’re clearly skilled with your hands - the piping on this frosting is flawless,” he says, handing cash to your sister in exchange for one of the cupcakes.

He brings the treat to his nose, inhaling deeply, his eyes never leaving yours. "Smells divine," he murmurs, voice low enough that only you can hear. Then, with a wink that makes your knees weak, he turns and strides away, weaving through the crowd with the same effortless grace that brought him to your booth. His confident stride draws more than a few appreciative glances from the other parents.

Your sister nudges you with her elbow, breaking you out of your daze. "See, I told you you're too modest with your baking skills," she whispers excitedly. "Bucky Barnes is usually a man of few words, and he dropped plenty just now."

You nod absently, still reeling from Bucky's sudden appearance and the way he'd looked at you. Your mind races, trying to process the conflicting emotions swirling within you. On one hand, there's the familiar spark of desire that Bucky always ignites. On the other, there's a new, tentative flutter of interest as you glance back at Aiden, who's patiently waiting with a warm smile.

Your sister, ever the matchmaker, seamlessly steers the conversation back to Aiden. "So, Aiden, you were asking about recommendations?" She gives you a subtle but pointed look.

You clear your throat. "Right. Well, the raspberry-lemon bars are a personal favorite. They've got just the right balance of sweet and tart."

Aiden's eyes light up. "That sounds perfect. I'll take two, please." As your sister boxes up his order, he turns back to you. "So, do you bake professionally? These look like they could be in a high-end bakery."

You laugh, shaking your head. "Oh no, it's just a hobby. I work in marketing, actually."

"Well, you certainly have a talent for it," Aiden says, his smile warm and genuine. "I can’t wait to try these,” he adds, holding up his box.

As you're about to respond to Aiden's compliment, your sister suddenly gasps and slaps her forehead dramatically. "Oh no! I completely forgot!" She turns to you with an exaggerated look of distress. "The PTA was supposed to set up the face-painting station, but I just realized we left all the supplies in my car!"

You raise an eyebrow, sensing the poorly disguised matchmaking attempt, but play along. "Oh, that's not good. You'd better go take care of that."

Your sister nods vigorously, already backing away from the booth. "Absolutely! Can't have disappointed kids on Valentine's Day!" She pauses, then turns to Aiden with a look of calculated innocence. "Aiden, I hate to impose, but would you mind helping my sister man the booth until I get back? It shouldn't take more than fifteen or twenty minutes.”

Aiden’s eyes flash to you, gleaming with amusement, clearly recognizing your sister's ploy for what it is, but he plays along anyway. "Of course! I'd be more than happy to lend a hand... or take an order or two," he jokes, winking at you.

Your cheeks flush a with heat, but you’re not totally unhappy with her shenanigans.

Your sister rushes off and Aiden takes her place behind the table. As the two of you settle into a rhythm working the table, you can't help but feel a spark of connection. His easy smile and warm demeanor put you at ease, and soon you're chatting effortlessly about everything from your shared love of books to your favorite local restaurants.

"So, marketing, huh?" Aiden asks during a lull. "What kind of projects do you work on?"

You launch into a brief explanation of your latest campaign, surprised at how easily the conversation flows. Aiden listens attentively, asking insightful questions that show he's genuinely interested. His green eyes sparkle with intelligence, and you find yourself drawn in by his charm.

"That sounds fascinating," he says, leaning in slightly. "I'd love to hear more about it sometime. Maybe over coffee?"

Your heart flutters at the invitation, but before you can respond, your eyes are inexplicably drawn across the crowded gymnasium. Through the sea of parents and children, you spot Bucky leaning against the far wall.

He's standing slightly apart from the crowd, his presence both magnetic and aloof. The sleeves of his dark blue plaid shirt are rolled up to his elbows, revealing the corded muscles of his forearms. His hair, usually disheveled when you see him, is neatly combed back into a bun, accentuating the sharp angles of his jaw.

As if sensing your gaze, Bucky's eyes lock with yours from across the room. A slow, knowing smile spreads across his face as he brings the cupcake to his lips. You watch, transfixed, as he takes a deliberate bite, his eyes never leaving yours.

The chocolate cake yields easily, and a smear of pink frosting clings to his upper lip. Your mouth goes dry as you watch his tongue dart out, slowly and purposefully licking away the sweet confection.

The sight sends a jolt of electricity through your body, igniting a fire low in your belly. Memories of that same tongue exploring your most intimate places flood your mind. You can almost feel the ghost of it and press your legs together.

Suddenly aware that you've been staring, you snap your attention back to Aiden, who's looking at you expectantly. You realize he's still waiting for an answer about coffee.

"Oh, um, yes," you stammer, trying to regain your composure. "Coffee sounds great."

Aiden's face lights up with a warm smile. "Wonderful! How about this Saturday?"

You nod, pushing thoughts of Bucky to the back of your mind. "Saturday works for me."

As you exchange numbers with Aiden, you can't help but feel a mix of excitement and guilt. Excitement at the prospect of getting to know this kind, handsome man better. Guilt because you know that no matter how charming Aiden is, a part of you is still thinking about Bucky and the raw, primal energy between you.

About how he probably would have no problem dragging you away to his car and fucking you in the parking lot right now.

You think that’s something Aiden would never do .

The rest of the bake sale passes in good conversation with Aiden, chatting between customers and stealing glances at each other when you think the other isn't looking. You learn that he's an architect, specializing in sustainable design, and his passion for his work is evident in the way his eyes light up as he describes his latest project.

"It's a community center," he explains, his hands moving animatedly as he speaks. "We're incorporating solar panels, rainwater harvesting systems, and even a rooftop garden. The goal is to create a space that not only serves the community but also educates them about sustainable living."

You find yourself genuinely interested, asking questions about the design process and the challenges he faces. As you listen, you can't help but appreciate how different this interaction is from your usual encounters with Bucky. With Aiden, there's a warmth, a sense of connection that’s so natural.

But your gaze drifts regularly to Bucky. Bucky has become attached to a young boy who looks to be about six years old. The resemblance between them is striking – the same strong jawline, the same chestnut brown hair. They grin and laugh together, Bucky follows him around to the face painting, a craft station, poses with him in the photo booth.

All you have ever shared with Bucky is sex. The two of you had given next to no time to small talk even in the first few days of messaging on the hook up app and in your first meet up. You had both made it clear you used each other for sex and didn’t want anything else from the connection.

As the bake sale winds down, your sister finally returns, apologizing profusely for needing to cover the face painting instead of helping at the booth. She winks at you when Aiden isn't looking, clearly pleased with her efforts. Aiden continues to linger, helping to fold up the tablecloth and carry boxes.

This morning you were thoroughly single, no need or with to do much to be otherwise. But now you find yourself torn between two very different men. Aiden, with his warm smile and gentle demeanor, represents the possibility of a genuine connection, of building something meaningful. Your conversation flows easily, and you can't deny the flutter in your chest when he laughs at your jokes.

But then there's Bucky. Your attention drawn back to him over and over, watching as he had interacted with the young boy who must be his son. It's a side of him you've never seen before, and it stirs something unexpected within you. The tenderness in his eyes as he looks at his child is a stark contrast to the raw intensity you're used to seeing when he looks at you.

As you and Aiden start packing up the remaining baked goods, Bucky approaches your booth once more. This time, the little boy is with him, clinging to his hand and looking up at you with wide, curious eyes.

"Hey," Bucky says, his voice smooth and charming. "We wanted to grab a few more treats before you packed up." His eyes flick to Aiden, then back to you, a flash of something - possessiveness? jealousy? - passing over his face.

"Of course," you manage, brightening your voice as you direct your attention to the small boy. "What would you like?"

The little boy tugs on Bucky's hand, pointing at the heart-shaped cookies. "Can I have those, Daddy?"

Your heart does a little flip at hearing Bucky called 'Daddy'. It's such a stark contrast to the Bucky you know - the one who whispers filthy things in your ear as he pounds into you.

"Sure thing, buddy. How about we get a few to take home for later?" Bucky suggests, his voice gentle as he speaks to his son.

You can't help but smile at the interaction as you carefully package up a half dozen of the heart-shaped cookies. As you hand the box to Bucky, your fingers brush against his, sending a whoosh of butterflies through your stomach. His eyes lock with yours, dark and intense, before he glances meaningfully at Aiden.

"Thanks," Bucky says, his voice low. "These look delicious. I'm sure they taste even better than they look." The double meaning in his words is clear, and you feel a flush creeping up your neck.

"I hope you enjoy them," you manage to reply, your voice slightly breathless.

As Bucky turns to leave, his son looks up at you with a shy smile. "Thank you for the treats!”

"You're very welcome, young man," you reply, smiling warmly at the little boy. As they walk away, you can't help but watch Bucky's retreating form, admiring the way his shirt clings to his broad shoulders.

You and Aiden finish packing up the last of the baked goods, and he helps you carry the boxes to your car.

"So, about Saturday," he says as you close the trunk. "There's this great little café downtown that does this stuffed french toast that will send you to heaven. How does that sound?”

You smile at Aiden, genuinely excited about the prospect of getting to know him better. "That sounds wonderful," you reply. "I love a good french toast."

As you exchange details for your upcoming date, you can't help but feel a mix of anticipation and guilt. Aiden is everything you should want - kind, intelligent, and clearly interested in more than just a physical relationship. Yet, as you watch him walk away, your mind drifts back to Bucky.

Later that night, as you're getting ready for bed, your phone buzzes with a text. Your heart races as you see Bucky's name on the screen.

BUCKY: Those cookies were delicious. But not as sweet as your cunt.

You bite your lip, torn between responding and ignoring the message. Before you can decide, another text comes through.

BUCKY: I'm in the neighborhood. Have any of that frosting left?

↠ Main Masterlist | Aspen's Ask Box | Field Guide to the Forest

I do not do tag lists, but FOLLOW @buckets-and-stories and TURN ON NOTIFICATIONS to be updated any time I publish a new work!

[bredforloyalty]

i am just asking if there is anyone who can give me a piece of advice i can USE or is it all guilttrips and half-hearted pats on the back

[quaranmine]

the amount of math i put into figuring out my PTO is honestly so funny. i've probably spent like 2 hours this week and last week just playing with the leave calculator spreadsheet my coworker gave me. this morning i added a sheet for 2026 so now i'm calculating my PTO out that far. i basically already have a plan of how i'm taking time off for 2025 so as to maximize my time off in 2026. i dont think this is a normal level of attention to detail but at least i'm having fun

[medicinemane]

.

[timeisacephalopod]

On one hand my one sister is Big Stupid and pregnant again, which I wouldn't care as much about if this wasn't the fourth kid with the fourth shitty fucking father who will do nothing but cause even MORE pain and suffering to my sister's life, and on the other hand my other sister keeps sending me apartment ads which is very sweet because she ALSO just had a baby (in August and also her situation is stable, I'm very proud she managed to pull off what she did considering where she's come from. Her boys, especially Older Nephew were SO excited for the baby and I love listening to Older Nephew talk about his sister, it's so heartening to see him so happy and excited. Something tells me my other sisters 3 girls won't be nearly as impressed, especially not Oldest Niece and it's gotten to a point where I feel somewhat compelled to try and mentor this poor kid but I don't know SHIT about kids and don't want to let this poor kid down like everyone else has, she deserves better than that).

Granted my whole life I've preferred Apartment Sister to Making Poor Life Choices sister but also recently Making Dumb Choices has made some serious improvements to her life, very impressive ones too, so it's just disappointing to watch her backslide especially into the same bullshit she's been doing since she was 18 and is now 32. But at least I'm not the only one apartment hunting 😂😂 her efforts are super appreciated given that she just moved herself as well, plus having a fresh baby (very cute baby too). Now with any luck my OTHER sibling will get her shit together hopefully before we're on child number six with father number six with all the same fucking personality flaws and mental health problems not one of these men take even remotely seriously because that's exhausting to me let alone my damn sister.

[starsarebleeding]

i think like. the thing i wish i could convey to people about my relationship to fibs is:

i am profoundly worried about the state of the world. i'm very anxious about what my future is going to look like, financially, professionally, geographically, physical-safety-wise. i know things are going to get worse before they get better, and i don't know if i'll live long enough to see them get better.

and

i would not want any other life. i wouldn't want to be any other person. i wouldn't want to be born any other time. and it's because i cannot imagine anything being better than what i feel when i love them.

[thoughtportal]

Opinion Here’s how to get free Paxlovid as many times as you need it

When the public health emergency around covid-19 ended, vaccines and treatments became commercial products, meaning companies could charge for them as they do other pharmaceuticals. Paxlovid, the highly effective antiviral pill that can prevent covid from becoming severe, now has a list price of nearly $1,400 for a five-day treatment course.

Thanks to an innovative agreement between the Biden administration and the drug’s manufacturer, Pfizer, Americans can still access the medication free or at very low cost through a program called Paxcess. The problem is that too few people — including pharmacists — are aware of it.

I learned of Paxcess only after readers wrote that pharmacies were charging them hundreds of dollars — or even the full list price — to fill their Paxlovid prescription. This shouldn’t be happening. A representative from Pfizer, which runs the program, explained to me that patients on Medicare and Medicaid or who are uninsured should get free Paxlovid. They need to sign up by going to paxlovid.iassist.com or by calling 877-219-7225. “We wanted to make enrollment as easy and as quick as possible,” the representative said.

Indeed, the process is straightforward. I clicked through the web form myself, and there are only three sets of information required. Patients first enter their name, date of birth and address. They then input their prescriber’s name and address and select their insurance type.

All this should take less than five minutes and can be done at home or at the pharmacy. A physician or pharmacist can fill it out on behalf of the patient, too. Importantly, this form does not ask for medical history, proof of a positive coronavirus test, income verification, citizenship status or other potentially sensitive and time-consuming information.

But there is one key requirement people need to be aware of: Patients must have a prescription for Paxlovid to start the enrollment process. It is not possible to pre-enroll. (Though, in a sense, people on Medicare or Medicaid are already pre-enrolled.)

Once the questionnaire is complete, the website generates a voucher within seconds. People can print it or email it themselves, and then they can exchange it for a free course of Paxlovid at most pharmacies.

Pfizer’s representative tells me that more than 57,000 pharmacies are contracted to participate in this program, including major chain drugstores such as CVS and Walgreens and large retail chains such as Walmart, Kroger and Costco. For those unable to go in person, a mail-order option is available, too.

The program works a little differently for patients with commercial insurance. Some insurance plans already cover Paxlovid without a co-pay. Anyone who is told there will be a charge should sign up for Paxcess, which would further bring down their co-pay and might even cover the entire cost.

Several readers have attested that Paxcess’s process was fast and seamless. I was also glad to learn that there is basically no limit to the number of times someone could use it. A person who contracts the coronavirus three times in a year could access Paxlovid free or at low cost each time.

Unfortunately, readers informed me of one major glitch: Though the Paxcess voucher is honored when presented, some pharmacies are not offering the program proactively. As a result, many patients are still being charged high co-pays even if they could have gotten the medication at no cost.

This is incredibly frustrating. However, after interviewing multiple people involved in the process, including representatives of major pharmacy chains and Biden administration officials, I believe everyone is sincere in trying to make things right. As we saw in the early days of the coronavirus vaccine rollout, it’s hard to get a new program off the ground. Policies that look good on paper run into multiple barriers during implementation.

Those involved are actively identifying and addressing these problems. For instance, a Walgreens representative explained to me that in addition to educating pharmacists and pharmacy techs about the program, the company learned it also had to make system changes to account for a different workflow. Normally, when pharmacists process a prescription, they inform patients of the co-pay and dispense the medication. But with Paxlovid, the system needs to stop them if there is a co-pay, so they can prompt patients to sign up for Paxcess.

Here is where patients and consumers must take a proactive role. That might not feel fair; after all, if someone is ill, people expect that the system will work to help them. But that’s not our reality. While pharmacies work to fix their system glitches, patients need to be their own best advocates. That means signing up for Paxcess as soon as they receive a Paxlovid prescription and helping spread the word so that others can get the antiviral at little or no cost, too.

{source}

[daemonbrain]

"One of me is cute but two though!"

2.4k, cw: breeding kink, smut, kinda baby trapping (?), not proofread

a/n: based off Juno by Sabrina Carpenter hehe happy reading :)

Simon would go to the ends of the earth for his bird. You wanted to watch your favorite movie for the millionth time with him? Done. You were craving take out from that special spot across town in the middle of the night? He’s placing your order and grabbing his keys to go pick it up after a quick goodbye kiss. You wanted him to kill a little red-haired prick who got too close to you -grazed your arm- yesterday at 17:37 while in a crowded line when he went to the loo, with his bare hands? Fan-tastic. (He may be projecting a little)

But he was worried. He might not be the most perceptive man, but he wasn’t so thick headed he couldn’t see the signs.

The way you made googly eyes at every baby you passed by. Fuck sakes he had never seen so. many. babies. 

Little things everywhere nowadays, though it might just be he’s now paying enough attention to notice. It definitely helped the unintentional search that your grip on his arm tightened every time you saw one. Your soft coos as you turned to him to say for a third time in a row that the babe was the “cutest thing you had ever seen”.

He loved you like he loved his gun after it got him out of a tough spot (he loved you more, but he's pretty poor at putting an example on it), but there was one thing he was wholly unsure he could give you. Being a father has never been something he was sure of, his own making his childhood a living hell assuring him that it wasn’t in his genes or anywhere in his future. He came to terms with that years ago and shoved the idea out of his mind entirely. 

As you both sat down at a coffee shop while taking a break from your park walk, you just happened to get seated right next to another woman, a stroller in your direct view.

Fuckin’ great.

Biting your lip you take a peek at the chubbiest little thing in a deep sleep. Catching the gaze of the mother you smile. “She’s adorable” you chirped. 

As the mother responded with a smile of her own, Simon felt a foot gently nudging his leg as gave him the prettiest eyes. Did you even try to hide it anymore? No, you really didn’t. Eyes filled with thinly veiled intentions, eyes that said “Look how cute! Jump across this table and give me one now,” 

“Isn’t she cute Si?!”

He sighed and replied in his usual grumble, “course, ‘er little jumper is nice.” Tactics. Swiftly move out from the topic and do not let the missus see the little bows… on the jumper… he just pointed- for fucks sake you saw it.

After quite some time giggling with the mother over photos, because of course that had to be the natural progression of things, Simon observed in his characteristic shadow-like demeanor before the little one began to fuss in her sleep. The mother excused herself and the babe to nurse and it’s then you finally turn back to your silent companion with your usual beaming.

“ ‘avin fun there, yeah?” He laughed which came out more as a snort as you mockingly kicked him under the table.

“I am as a matter of fact!”

Pulling his hands into the air in surrender he looks you head on. “Okay, I get it.”

“The baby was just so- ugh! Did you see how chubby she was? Her little hair.. Gosh!” Stay on task. Do not get distracted by the target's beautiful smile or laugh. Someone had to be the voice of rationale after all.

“Like I said ‘er jumper was nice, luv.”

When the pout came to your lips, he considered it a success (you were hot either way) and chalked the whole thing as a minor bump in the road. Whatever this baby fever was would pass.

Nonetheless, he should’ve known his bird better than that. She wasn’t a quitter, that’s for damn sure. As you cooked up dinner in that cute apron and served it plated up so nicely it dawned on him just how… domestic this all was.

It was nice, he concluded. Calm.

You remained pensive and quiet for the most part during dinner, clearly desperate to say what you had been on your mind for weeks. He could see the way your mind's gears turned, wanting to blurt it out. Like an animal going feral at the bars of its cage. Except your the animal and your cage is the inherent trust you will not go awol and chuck your birth control pills into the trash while he’s not watching.

“Simon…” 

Here it comes.

Simon grunted out his response while chewing on his food, looking up to meet your cautious gaze. Leaning across the table you gently lay your hand on his which held his fork, pushing it down.

“I’ve been thinking… a lot lately.” There you went with that look again. “Have you… ever thought of kids before? I- I know we’ve had this talk before… but-”

“C’mere.”

He outstretched his big arms and patted his lap. With quick acceptance you hurried over and let him pull you on top of him, one hand on the back of his chair and the other on your ass for support. The deep kneading of it was also for support of course. 

“You know how I feel about them. ‘Is jus not somethin I think about, luvie.” He didn’t dare look away from your eyes. If he was about to take that gleam out of your eyes he at least owed it to you to watch.

You grabbed his face with a light touch and caressed the stubble which had begun to grow with a look beginning to resemble a spot of desperation. Pressing yourself further into his body, you couldn’t help your protests.

“Si.. I just- I want one so bad.” You began to slide your hand down the side of his neck, pressing forward to gently place a kiss. Leaning your forehead in the junction between his shoulder and neck you continued before he could respond.

“Don’t you? A little baby with us all the time.”

Someone had to be the voice of reason and Simon was going to have to put his foot down on this.

“You’re not thinkin straigh’, luv. It would be cute-” He was cut off in shock as he felt the slight rock of your hips as you cowered into his shoulder.

“Just imagine it! One of me is cute enough, but two!” The pace began to speed up as you blatantly started grinding against him. He let out a little huff. Voice of reason. Though his reason was nowhere to be found when he put his hand that was idly on the chair to your backside to encourage the movement.

You knew what came next, you had to sweeten the pot. You knew you were being mean, but you just had to! You were practically given no choice!

“Don’t you want that Si! Don’t you wanna make something together?” You all but pleaded. He looked straight past your head with a crumbling steely demeanor. Fuck.

You already began to tug at his shirt and with a final glare, Simon couldn’t help but look at his pretty bird. His pretty bird on top of the prize she coveted, heat passing between their bodies. Just one time. One time and then they could talk about this properly. 

Simon gathered you up in his arms and stood while pressing an eager kiss to your lips. It was a soft and long thing as he brought you both to the bedroom you shared. He threw you down on the bed and stripped himself as you excitedly did the same.

Smiling up at him as if you won. You did not win. This was not a win, right? You were on your birth control either way, he would pull out as needed. What harm is there in fucking his own girl.

Pushing you on to your back he parted your legs to look what lay between them. There was the prize he was most proud of. Puffy cunt at the mercy of the cool air being pushed out by the vents. You were already beginning to shine.

“You were just waiting for it weren’t you? Knew I couldn’t leave you hanging, yeah?”

With a giggle you spread your thighs further and wiggled your hips teasingly. Simon dropped to his knees and pulled your body to the edge of the bed. Throwing each of your legs on either of his shoulders he spit into your cunt, taking two thick fingers and rubbing it in, catching on to your hole lightly as he played with the slick. He could see the way your stomach tightened as he circled your clit and he winded you up further when he firmly flicked it.

“Si” you whined.

“Wha’ is it?” He grinned as he lowered his head to press a kiss down. Devolving from a kiss, he grabbed onto one of your thighs with a strong grip and began to sloppily lick while you let out your breathy little moans, sensitive to the absolute tank holding you still as he ate straight from the source.

He licked and it just kept going. Dragging his tongue around your cunt, up to your puffy clit. He harshly sucked as he latched on to it drawing a cry from your vulnerable form. Tugging at his hair, he only looks up with his eyes, refusing to pull away his mouth. 

Shaking your head with wide eyes you couldn’t help but push your fluffy little agenda.

“Si please. Please. Please, I need it! I’d never ask for anything else-” you moaned in surprise once again as he added a finger into your hole. Willing himself to pull away from you, Simon continued to fuck his finger into you as he spoke up, spittle and slick coating his mouth. He had to switch gears, use logic (and cum) to deter you.

“We’d never have time. All this?-” He added another finger into your clenching pussy “Gone. We’d be cleaning spit up instead.”

“We’d have a baby!” You exclaimed insistently.

You were practically off the edge, usually by now Simon had you fucked into your own little world. This incessant begging for a little one of your own is keeping you sharper than usual. He’d fix that.

“Please Simon” You pulled him up, the strain of his cock to be inside you encouraging him to follow your movements. He looked at you pretty tits, pretty like everything else on you. Taking a nipple between his fingers and rolling hard.

“These’d get all full.”

Fuck that backtracked his own point. His mind fighting back the onslaught of thoughts at the sight of your tits growing round and heavy because of something he could do. Would your body get all soft- NO.

Lining himself up and looking at that pleading expression, the only time he’d ever seen you so wanting of something you were willing to roll around with nothing else on your mind.

“Just one Si, just one with your eyes your nose your hair-” Your breath went short as he pushed himself in, giving shallow thrusts to feed into your aching cunt. Recomposing yourself you gripped on to his bicep, “Just do it, lock me down tonight.”

Simon couldn’t help the way he subconsciously began pushing your thighs up to give himself a deeper angle, your ankles dangling weightlessly above your head, knees to your chest. The groans which sounded through the room as his hips hammered into you in a desperate chase. 

The two of you could do nothing but stare into each other's eyes, losing yourselves in each other while your cunt squeezes him like a vice. Determined to keep him there, body obstinately stuck on one thing.

 Someone had to be the voice of reason. Someone had to object to a little one with his eyes and your personality. Someone had to be rational and not think about painting the nursery while you waddled about. Someone had to remain level-headed and not imagine the way your eyes would light up with unfettered joy.

You tossed your head back and he couldn’t help but grip your face in his hand, tugging it right back to him.

“With me luv, with me. Look at me.”

Someone had to be rational.

Nodding your head shakily you keep your eyes on the massive man pounding away at you, feeling the way your stomach bulges trying to accommodate all of him, your cunt coaxing him further into the sticky trap.

Your body begging for one thing, you looked like you needed it. Tongue lolling out of your mouth as you were fucked stupid, sweat collecting on your brow. You looked perfect. Your whining swallowed by his own mouth when he presses another kiss to your swollen lips, body enduring in hopes the fat cock ruthlessly disturbing its peace would grant it the big load it craved.

Someone had to be rational?

Maybe it was the way you sucked him in, the way he couldn’t stop thrusting into you, but it’s as if your body sent some message to the receptors in his mind. All that flashed before him images of happy and full and with his baby.

As if you could sense his thoughts, your own peak quickly overcame you white hot. The way you spasmed around him with a loud cry of pure ecstasy.

“Give it to me!” You somehow managed. His mind went blank as drunk off the pleasure as you were, the only thing he could do was thrust, unable to comprehend anything else.

 A shame Simon couldn’t be rational when it came to his bird.

With the final slam of his hips, his release went into the deepest depths of you. His grip on your hips burning from how tight it was as he kept himself flush against you.

It took a few moments to come down from the high. Simon looked at your sweaty face, hazy from lack of energy. Maybe you did win this one, but he really didn't get all this effort (not that he was complaining) if you were still on birth control.

Birth control... which he hasn't had to remind you to take for quite some time...

Out of pure curiosity at his realization, he gently pushed the two of you further up the bed while keeping you plugged up. Opening the first drawer he manages to grab the box which contained your birth control pills. Upon further inspection, he notices it remains unopened and untouched. Shaking his head with a gruff laugh he peers down at you as you shiver from the rumble.

“Dirty girl”

You just smiled.

[yueebby]

𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐲𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞𝐧 – 𝐠𝐨𝐣𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮

synopsis. period piece, forbidden love

contents. ooc, angst (eventual comfort), yandere emperor!gojo, lovesick!gojo, servant!reader, obsessive behavior (5k words of gojo pining), lowkey unreliable narrator, time skips

notes. inspired by the apothecary diaries and this post. loosely based off of ancient japan (this is basically its own world). this is the prologue to the series where everything can generally be read as a standalone ! (fic under the cut)

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emperor!gojo who broke a hundred year tradition to take you as his only lover. despite your role as a concubine, everyone in the imperial palace knew he was going to make you his empress.

emperor!gojo who had not meant to fall in love with you, but you have managed to somehow charm him. a man that single handedly brought his own clan to power– weak in your hands. hushed whispers around the imperial palace call you a witch, but they never reach your ears. not as long as he is alive.

emperor!gojo shamelessly showering you with love. he pays no mind that it is highly frowned upon, he will have his hands on you every time you are in the same room.

emperor!gojo who is livid when there is an attempt on your life. his usual ocean eyes turned to blue flames like a wild animal. servants and clan elders alike scurry under his gaze. the assailant is taken care of by his own hands. 

emperor!gojo who is forced to satiate the clan elders into submission by taking in another concubine from an influential clan. he insists to you that it is no more than a political formality. who are you to meddle into imperial affairs?

emperor!gojo who can’t help himself and ends up falling for another girl who his clan elders demand he must wed. she is much younger than you, beautiful and is well bred; a perfect match for the emperor. 

emperor!gojo whose frequent visits to you come to an end, forcing you to move from his chambers and back to the consorts’ pavilion.

There was a time when you had everything. A place to call home in the Inner Court, a beautiful palace with anything you could have ever dreamed of. Servants, admirers, riches; you had it all. But what was most dear to you was your lover– a man so divine, many thought he was directly blessed by the hand of God. It was too good to be true. A woman of lowly birth like you, paid as homage for the sins of her clan against the new reigning family of Japan, becoming a concubine of the Heavenly Emperor. 

You remembered it all too well.

His brilliant mind that once strategized the downfall of the previous imperial family, calculating its next move in a game of Go against you. You can still remember the shock on his face upon his first defeat. The way he would keep you from leaving to fulfill your other duties until he was satisfied, eyebrows furrowing as he struggled to keep up with you. No matter how hard he tried, you remained victorious. It drove him mad.

You remembered the stolen kisses while you made your rounds in the Inner Palace with your ladies in waiting. It took you quite a while to learn to tune out their giggles every time the Emperor dips you down to taste your lips in broad daylight. The grin that he wore after was enough to leave your legs weak.

Above all, you'll always remember how safe you felt in his strong, reassuring embrace. You’ve seen him train, and it was no wonder the Gojo clan rose to power so quickly as a result of one man. The way he wields the katana is unlike any man on the face of the earth. Those arms were your sanctuary. You can still vividly recall the attempt on your life, orchestrated by a traditionalist incensed by the Gojo clan's swift ascent to power. The emperor, outraged by the assassination plot, personally saw to the man's execution. 

However, the damage was done and it caused great strain in the Imperial Palace.

To appease the old geezers that were forced out of power, Emperor Gojo had taken in another concubine from one of the Big Three families of Japan— a beautiful Zenin girl. Her flowing, silky hair and saccharine voice enchanted everyone in the Inner Palace, captivating the Emperor, most of all. She was younger than you, with perkier breasts and soft skin that was enough to capture the attention of any man. 

You don’t blame her for taking the Emperor’s attention away. Though you would be a liar if you said it did not hurt you. Deep down, you cannot deny the agony that sears your soul, realizing that the only semblance of love you've ever tasted remains unrequited. With a heavy heart, you resign yourself to the bitter truth of your existence, knowing all too well the cruel confines of your place in this world.

You were merely a pawn, and the Emperor did not want you anymore.

That was made clear months later when you received a scroll from the Emperor’s advisor, a man you were once well acquainted with, Geto Suguru. 

“What is this?” You asked him quietly, your heart silently begging the Heavens it was not what you had suspected it to be. The black haired man in front of you does not respond, and you feel something pierce into your heart. Despite being a part of the Emperor’s court, it was rare that you received letters directly.

Your suspicions were confirmed when your shaky hands finally opened the scroll to read the familiar kanji written by your beloved.

“The Emperor decrees the termination of your role as concubine." Geto spares you the trouble of deciphering the characters neatly written in ink. “In his mercy, you are to be moved as a servant in the Outer Court. You are to serve the Imperial Physician.”

What you remember most was the silence. The Emperor’s silence after the stressful months you had to endure alone. The silence shared between you and Geto when you were forced out of the Imperial Court. All that was left was the sound of your heart breaking and the wood creaking underneath Geto’s feet as he walked away. Satoru never bothered to see you off.

Seasons change and by the next spring, you’re busying your hands with collecting herbs for the Imperial Physician, a man by the name of Yaga Masamichi. He is a kind man, pitying you enough to fill your days with laborious tasks to prevent your mind from wandering to thoughts of the unfortunate turn your life has taken. He is even generous enough to supply you with a new wardrobe of clothing full of light fabrics, a luxury you thought you would lose in the Outer Palace. Though the initial humiliation has worn off with the passing of time, you are still constantly reminded of your fall from grace.

Looks by the mix of condolences and disgust are shared when you roam the walls of the Outer Palace. You hear whispers of how the Emperor is infatuated with his newer, shinier toy. It is enough for you to swallow the bile that makes its way up your throat. 

“It is no wonder the Emperor tossed away a wildflower like her in exchange for a cherry blossom. He needed someone to rival his own greatness.” A particular comment stopped you in your tracks. Your grip tightens on the woven basket in your hand filled with medicinal herbs you had collected earlier that morning. 

“Have some pity on her.” Another eunuch whispers. Your breath falters, but you continue your walk with your head held up. You’ve heard the rumors. The beautiful Zenin Himiko has charmed the Emperor enough that there are rumors of a royal marriage to come. It doesn’t help that the Emperor has remained monogamous to her since he had banished you from his court.

A comforting hand links itself with your arm, “Ignore them. I saw Yaga shooing away a crowd of suitors that were lined up for your hand.” Ieiri Shoko scoffs, secretly sending you a wink. She has been studying medicine under Yaga for nearly a decade, eagerly accepting you as a companion upon your arrival. You feel your cheeks heat up at her flattery. You know she’s just trying to make you feel better.

Although your beauty never faded, it seems as though you are no longer sought after in the marriage market. Not that it matters, considering the new life that you’re living. You’re now a personal servant to the Imperial Physician, leaving no time to worry about suitors and such. Your days are filled with good work— tending to Yaga’s cherished garden that he has sowed for decades rather than frivolous games and attending the Emperor. It may not be glorious compared to your former life, but it was the best a woman of your status could receive. 

When you and Shoko return to Yaga’s estate, you’re surprised to see the somber look that has settled on his aging features. Shoko makes an offhand comment that he will age faster if he keeps scowling. She receives a scolding.

“Is something the matter?” You gently place down your basket full of herbs. 

Yaga sighs, calloused hands rolling up a scroll with the Imperial Seal. “It appears the Emperor’s consort has fallen ill and His Majesty commands my presence in the Imperial Palace.” 

The Royal Consort. The woman that dethroned you: Zenin Himiko.

“I understand.” You nod, maintaining your composure while two sets of eyes scrutinize you with keen observation. It was only natural the emperor wanted the best doctor in the country for his object of affection. “Shall I close up the shop while you journey into the Inner Palace?” 

Yaga shakes his head, “That won’t be necessary. I will have Shoko act as my stand-in.” He remarks with a quick glance in her direction “You, on the other hand, will accompany me.” 

Your eyes widen. 

“You cannot be serious.”

“Typically, one of my apprentices would accompany me on such journeys. However, now that I have acquired a personal attendant,” He gestures towards you with a flick of his hand, “It shall no longer be necessary.” As he speaks, he runs his hand absentmindedly through his well trimmed beard, gaging your reaction.

"I—" Your words falter and fade away. "Yes, sir," you respond, inclining your head in deference, a stark reminder of your place. While you may have concealed it, you were seething with humiliation. Returning to the Imperial Palace after a year of exile to serve the woman who took your spot was mortifying beyond measure.

“Very well. Pack enough for one week’s time. I doubt the Emperor would have called me if this was a light ailment.” He says gruffly. “We leave at dawn.” His gaze shifted to the horizon outside.

1 YEAR AGO

“Your Grace,” You purr at the feeling of his large hands scratching your head. 

The smile that rests on his face is almost ravenous. “Yes, my love?”

“I think—“ A soft sigh escapes your lips when he presses on your weak points. “I should g-go.”

His ministrations stop almost immediately. 

“Go?” His eyes peer down at you in his lap. It is now that you realize the weight of his piercing gaze. “Have I commanded you to leave yet?”

“No, but—”

“Then you have nowhere else to be.” He huffs, unintentionally puffing his cheeks out. You stifle the giggle that nearly escapes from your lips. He vaguely resembles a pufferfish– or so you think. Though you’ve never seen the round creature with your very own eyes, you’ve heard that the delicacy was something only members of the aristocratic class would feast on. 

Your mouth waters at the thought.

“What are you thinking about that could possibly be so important? Keep your eyes on me,” A strong hand squishes your cheeks together and firmly guides your face back upon him. 

You should be embarrassed; ashamed at the intimate position His Majesty has trapped you in. The way your head is tucked away in his lap as he peers down at you, nothing to shield you away from him. It was incredibly scandalous, considering that you were an unmarried woman! But it seemed like the Emperor had taken no mind towards it. You would even dare to say that he was enjoying it, with the way his lips quirk upward at the sight of you squirming. 

“Your Grace,” You repeat, determined to free yourself from his hold. His eyebrows furrow.

“Satoru,” He reminds you. You purse your lips. The position you hold in his court is simply not high enough to grant you the privilege of calling him by his given name.

“Your Grace,” You try again, the title rolling off of your tongue naturally. A man like him did not deserve any title less than.

“You’re breaking my heart, sweetheart. Indulge a man, won’t you?” He pouts down at you. As stubborn as ever, you don’t relent.

“I would be overstepping my boundaries as your consort to call you as such. That privilege is reserved for your future bride.” You take advantage of his guard let down to sit up and escape his hold. If he could have caught you, he made no effort.

“I am a simple man.” He follows you to your vanity. A giggle escapes your mouth. He is anything but. “I want my love to call me by my name.” 

You turn around to cup his cheek. He eagerly leans into your touch, sighing happily at the contact.

“I wonder how Lord Kento and Geto would react to you like this.” You tease, a smile unknowingly painting itself on your lips. 

Satoru’s face falls, features morphing into an appalled expression. You watch him close the distance between you through the mirror.

“Kento?” His voice had a dangerous lilt in it. You blink, unsure what spurred on the sudden tension in the room. “Since when were you so comfortable around him? He cannot satisfy you like I can.” He reminds you of the man’s castrated state as an eunuch. You wince.

“I have not gotten comfortable,” You’re careful to pick your words. Gojo’s possessiveness was something that was not easily tamed. “He simply provides good conversation while you are away.The palace is far too big and lonely while you’re away dealing with clan matters.” 

The only response you get is a quiet grumble. “You’re lucky that you’re pretty.” His large hand creeps its way into your hair again, undoing the hairstyle your ladies in waiting had spent a copious amount of time on earlier that morning. Gojo carefully plucks the extravagant silver hairpin from your hair, the dangling pearls clicking softly at the sudden movement.  His hands slowly make their way down to the kimono that you are wearing, hands ready to undo the obi.

Your hands softly hover his, “I fear that our roles have been reversed. Should it not be me who gets you unready, Your Grace?”

He chuckles and through the mirror you can see a smirk make his way to his lips, “I’d let you undress me any day. Just say the word, beloved.” 

You roll your eyes, but allow him to continue. It was moments like these with the Emperor that led you on to believe that there was a semblance of love between the two of you. 

How wrong you were.

PRESENT DAY

The sun has yet to meet the horizon when you arrive at the Inner Palace. The horse-drawn carriage that you and Yaga had taken is the only sound at the scene, clopping down the stone road and back to the Inner Court. You miss the serenity of the beautiful palace you once resided in, knowing that it will be bustling with life in just a few short hours.

In front of the large doors of the primary ceremonial hall where the Emperor spends most of his time, stands Lord Nanami, a counsellor to the Emperor himself. Time has only made his face sterner, but his neatly styled hair and blue and yellow dyed court attire remained the same. He waits patiently while you and Yaga make your way up the flight up stairs that lead up to the hall.

“I am glad to see you in good health, Yaga.” Nanami bows. 

The man next to you promptly waves his politeness off, thanking him for his hospitality. You stand silently while the two men engage in conversation regally.

Lord Nanami sighs, “His Majesty has been plagued by stress lately. To say I am relieved by your presence would be an understatement.” His statement is a subtle reminder that you must harden your heart upon entering the palace walls. The meticulously built walls were no longer a sanctuary for you, rather, a painful testament that you were no longer wanted. 

Yaga lets out a hearty laugh and it reveals a rare sight, Lord Nanami’s lips curving upwards by a slight. “I highly doubt the boy would be glad to see me. The appearance of the Imperial Physician is portentous.” He scratches his beard. You tilt your head in confusion at how he referred to the Emperor.

“I suppose, yet I am intrigued to find out how he will react upon seeing his object of affection flourishing anew despite the sting of frost.” Nanami audibly wonders. Even a fool could understand his eloquent comparison. The Emperor would be thrilled to see his consort in full bloom once again. You pray that the Heavens would grant you some mercy from witnessing such a scene.

“Youth,” Yaga shakes his head, chuckling to himself before regaining composure. “I mustn't keep the Emperor waiting. [Name], please gather the herbal ingredients to treat the young Consort as you seem fit. I shall confer with His Majesty and meet you in her chambers to declare a proper diagnosis.”

You bow, “Yes sir.”

While Yaga prepares to enter the doors where The Heavenly Emperor resides, your eyes couldn’t help but gaze longingly at the large bronze doors. 

“You seem well,” Nanami addresses you for the first time in over a year. Your eyes trail from the Emperor’s door to the blonde man in front of you. “Allow me to guide you to our herbal stock.” Nanami offers you his arm as you start to make your way down the stairs. 

You take it, lightly holding his arm.  “Thank you, Lord Nanami. Time away from the Inner Palace has been like a breath of fresh air,” You respond, ensuring your voice carries no malice. You hear the large palace doors from behind you open, the metal creaking loudly in the quiet dawn. 

“I must ask you to call me Kento,” He leads you down the stone steps. “We are old friends, it is strange to hear anything but.” 

You focus on your steps down the stairs, only responding once your feet meet the solid ground, “I fear that our social statuses have changed since then. It would be the cause of a scandal should anyone hear I am calling the Imperial Counselor by his given name. Your admirers would have my head on a stick.”

“Your imagination is amusing as always, [Name].” He gives you a closed eyes smile. You huff.

“I am only speaking the truth!” You insist. He chuckles.

“It is quite refreshing to see both you and Yaga again. I’m not sure how long it has been since I have been at the imperial physician.” 

You gape at his confession. “You mustn't skip your annual visits to the physician, Kento. It is in the best interest of your health!” You lightly scold him, lifting your hand to flick his forehead. It was a force of habit. “Perhaps if I have time after treating the Consort, I shall do a check up on you.”

Nanami clears his throat at your comment, the twinkle in his eyes dissipating as if your direct touch had burned him. 

“I would rather not lose my head.” He mumbles, eyes scanning the courtyard around the two of you. You knit your eyebrows, confused.

Nanami leaves you to fulfill his duties once you arrive at the Royal Kitchens to retrieve all the necessary items to treat Consort Himiko. You are glad that he did not accompany you into the kitchens to prepare Consort Himiko’s herbal soup. 

The memory of it still irks you.

“You’re late,” One of Consort Himiko’s ladies in waiting snaps just as you enter the kitchen. You look up to see a young girl, dressed in a light purple kimono. It must be Himiko’s signature, you note. It was strange to see someone outside of the Imperial family donning the color, but you suppose it was only a grand display of Himiko’s influence.

“You’re a lot more plain than I anticipated,” The other lady in waiting quirks an eyebrow, eyeing your appearance. You furrow your eyebrows, shocked by their rudeness.Their undying loyalty to their Lady was enough to fuel an unspoken hatred for you. Though you’re not sure that the two coincide, you don’t blame them.

The two are mixing a concoction that you don’t recognize to be used to treat the sick. The taller one adds some aromatics and herbs in and you see the other one unwrap a cloth to reveal a rare delicacy from the West. Cocoa, you believed they called it. 

Then it hits you– the two are not making a medicinal soup for their Lady, rather they are making an aphrodisiac! The image that conjures in your head makes you blanch. Back in the Outer Palace, Shoko had shown you the effects of the stimulant (you shiver at the memory of her shoving a treat laced with it into your mouth). It was certainly a night to remember.

“How pathetic,” You mutter underneath your breath, quickly rushing to obtain the ingredients you needed without making conversation with the two girls.

Fortunately, they pay you no further attention for the time you’re in the kitchen.

“Please excuse me,” You bow upon entering the Emperor’s chambers. Despite the Consort’s Pavilion being similar in size to a small town, you remember spending most of your time in the Emperor’s chambers rather than your own. It was probably the same case with Consort Himiko. You slowly place the tray carrying broth and medicinal herbs to treat the Consort down on the circular wooden table in the middle of the room.

Out of curiosity, your eyes can’t help but soak in the Emperor’s room. Not much has changed since you’ve left. His Majesty’s preference for minimalist decorations have stayed the same, along with his natural musk that fills your nose. You feel your face heat up at your own thoughts. How could you think of such a thing when you are about to meet his new lover?

Your gaze moves to his bed, where Consort Himiko resides– only to find nothing.

“Huh?” 

You observe his bed, silk sheets neatly made, seemingly untouched. The sounds of your sock clad feet patter on the wooden floor as you make your way to feel the bedsheets for any signs of warmth, but you are met with nothing.

“Don’t you know that entering the Emperor’s chambers can be punishable by death?” A deep voice from behind you causes you to jump in your spot. 

Your guard is immediately raised, head whipping to the sound. In hindsight, you should have never agreed to accompany Yaga on his trip. It was a foolish idea all along, you think as all of the air in your lungs dissipates upon seeing your former lover. 

Standing at the entrance of his own sleeping quarters is Gojo Satoru, his frame big enough to tower over the doorway. His arms are crossed over each other, electric blue eyes focused on nothing else but you. You press your thighs together tightly to avoid squirming anymore than you are.  He has loosened his dark blue kimono to expose some of his hardened chest, a sight any woman in the nation would die to catch a glimpse.  Even underneath all of the fabric, anyone can see his divinely sculpted physique.

“Your Grace,” You waste no time to dip your body deeply, praying that he will allow you to keep your head by sunset. “I apologize for the intrusion, I was under the pretense that Consort Himiko resided in your quarters–” Your voice loses itself in your throat when you see his shadow quickly encroaching.

“Himiko stays in her Pavilion,” He towers over you, eyes gazing down on you. “But one might suspect that you already knew that.”

Your eyes frantically meet his feet, desperate to salvage what was left of your dignity, “I assure you that I speak of the truth, Your Majesty.”

When he doesn’t respond, you slowly lift your head.

The flustered look on your face must have been amusing to him, as he makes his way closer to you, bending down to interrogate you further.

“Is that so?” He hums, enjoying every second of cornering you into his chambers. The back of your legs have met his bed, trapping you. You inhale sharply, trying to keep your breaths even, refusing to give him the satisfaction of knowing the effect he had on you.

He continues, “You’re awfully skittish for someone who was happily skipping around my territory in the arms of another man just earlier.” His predatory gaze seems to darken. 

“Kento?” When his name leaves your lips, the man in front of you grits his teeth. You turn your head to the side, deliberately avoiding him. “With all due respect, Your Majesty, but I don’t see how Kento and I’s relationship is any of your concern,” He does not take your actions well, his gaze searing into you.

“It certainly is when the woman in question is you,” Gojo’s voice loses its feral lilt, distress flashing across his face. There’s a newfound desperation in it that chips away at your resolve. His hand raises to your face so slowly, as if he did not want to startle you.

“This is wrong. I– I saw a couple of servants earlier making aphrodisiacs, perhaps you could have unknowingly consumed them.” You tell him, frantic eyes meeting him. It is not unusual for couples to use aphrodisiacs, you know that after under Yaga. The Emperor must have mistaken the laced dessert for his usual. 

He shakes his head, running a hand through his white hair.

“You are mistaken. This is solely your effect on me.” He promises. You could barely believe his words, stuck between feeling offended or shocked.

“How could you stand to be so cruel?” Your voice is barely above a whisper. There are no tears in your eyes this time.  “I am not a courtesan you can buy for the night,” You snap, pointing a harsh finger to his chest. 

“What do you mean?” He sounds breathless.

“Whatever do I mean?” You scoff, a dry laugh escaping your mouth. “For a year, all I have gotten is pity from the world, because you decided I was no longer entertaining. You could have at least banished me away yourself. Instead, you sent Suguru who couldn’t even look me in the eye! Don’t you know how humiliating that is?” With every word that left your lips, more venom seemed to drip. Anger was prickling you all over, taking control of the rational part of you.

Gojo seemed to be taken aback by your outburst. It was far too late to take anything back now. If you lose your head by nightfall, so be it.

You dig a deeper grave for yourself when you take advantage of his moment of weakness to flee. He’s quick to react, attempting to grip your wrist.

“Wait, [Name], beloved–” He uses that all too familiar term of endearment, but it doesn't deter you.

You accidentally bump into the circular wooden table placed in the middle of the room. What an awful place to keep it, watching in horror as the Consort’s medicine shatters on the floor. To add salt to the wound, a vase you recognize to be specially gifted to the Emperor from a foreign nation tips off too before you can catch it. The sound of porcelain shattering fills the room.

“[Name]! Are you alright?” You hear Gojo ask from behind you, but you run over the broken shards before he can catch you.

Had you bothered to pay closer attention, you would have noticed articles of your clothing and a couple of your missing belongings littered all over the room– creating a faux impression that you never really left the palace.

Days passed by after the incident, and luckily, your head was still attached to your body despite offending and nearly endangering the Emperor. Yaga’s disappointment when you had told him what happened was made evident when he sent you home early after hearing the events that transpired, insisting that he can handle the Consort on his own. Normally you would have argued, but you knew better than to inflict Yaga’s wrath.

“Now you’ve really done it,” Shoko whistles lowly, walking in from the front of Yaga’s shop. 

You hide your face in your hands, “I made an absolute fool of myself, didn’t I?”

“A fool? No. A conspirator against the Emperor? Perhaps.” She dangles a scroll with a familiar seal on it. The Gojo Clan’s familiar emblem reflects off of the sunlight spilling into the room. Your heart drops.

“Oh, they’ll have my head.” You moan, hands instinctively lifting to shield your neck.

“Though I’m quite impressed that Yaga only sent you back here. He used to have worse punishments.” She shudders before impatiently unraveling the scroll. You watch her eyes gradually widen as they read the contents of the letter. The scroll falls from her hand.

You rush to it, desperate to read your fate.

To [Last Name] [First Name],

Greetings and prosperity unto you.

By the mandate of the heavens and the authority vested in Us, We hereby extend Our solemn words to you, [Last Name] [First Name], servant of the realm, in acknowledgement of your debt to the Empire.

In response to your unmeritorious deeds, The Emperor bestows upon you His imperial pardon from capital punishment. In consideration of your obligations and the harmony of the realm, it is hereby decreed that you shall serve as an indentured servant to the Imperial Household for a period commensurate with your debt. During this time, you shall labor faithfully and diligently under the supervision of Our Heavenly Emperor, performing duties essential to the welfare of the Empire.

By fulfilling your obligations with diligence and humility, you may yet earn favor and esteem in Our sight.

The Imperial Court

A loud gasp escapes your mouth.

You feel your legs weaken, your emotions running wild. Shoko’s eyes meet yours, mirroring your frantic gaze. In that moment, you are met with the same suffocating sense of hopelessness.

extra!

gojo was kicking his feet happily as he watched suguru draft out his letter to you. suguru thought it rather cruel, while the white haired male was too busy purring happily as he fantasized about having you back into his grasp.

[yeahwellyourface]

You know who I do feel bad for in all this?

The person who turned Luigi in. I don't agree with what they did, but I get it. If they are working for McDonald's, they are probably at minimum wage. Full time (which they probably weren't, cause fuck McDonalds probably doesnt want to have to give benefits)yearly pay for min wage is $15,000. The rewards together were $60,000.

Can you imagine how much that would change their life? FOUR TIMES their yearly wage. I am so incredibly privileged in comparison, but four times my yearly wage would change so many things for me.

You think about your family, and how much that could help. You think about your living situation. You think about rent and food prices and a vehicle. All of that would be so much easier, even for a little bit of time.

And then to find out that you probably won't get the money on technicalities. And if you do, you definitely won't get all of it. And even then, it will take at least a year.

Being told that you would get something that would change your life, the life of your children, and it's bullshit. Yet another reason you can't trust the cops.

And it also shows another way that authorities are so fucking stupid about this whole thing. Any trust people had in them is being blown out of the water. It is so incredibly clear the difference in ways people are treated. Children are being killed in school and nothing, but one CEO gets shot and it's considered terrorism. A CEO who profited off the deaths of thousands. But that person is more important than all us regular people. And now this reward BS. Do they actually think ANYONE is gonna help them again after seeing how they are screwing this person over

And eric fucking adams being in that fucking perp walk. That bastard has spent the past several months talking "innocent until proven guilty" and "due process"...but only when it comes to committing his own crimes. Not someone else's where he can pretend that he is some sort of hero.

It is amazing how people who are in power and people who think thay they can gain power by protecting the rich are so out of touch.

[biscuityskies]

With the impending implementation of Project 2025, I suspect that AO3 will come under fire as well. And given that it’s a US based organisation, and the US has wedged itself somehow into every possible thing, I would also suspect that this will have global impacts. I cannot be certain of it - I’m certainly not an expert on political things and Trump remains, frankly, unpredictable - but I have personally found it’s more helpful to prepare beforehand than to scramble to keep myself afloat in the midst of a crisis. Knowing how important our favourite stories are to so many of us, here’s what I suggest:

Readers, I recommend you find your favourite stories again. Go all the way back in your bookmarks. Tell the authors you appreciate them, and you love their work. I think we could all use some nice words right now. If you want to keep the story, I recommend downloading it: here’s a guide on how to do so from the AO3 FAQ. I personally have wanted to take up bookbinding for a hot second; I might print off my favourite fics for myself and figure out how to bind them. The OTW also recommends downloading your favourites - see link below.

Authors, I recommend you keep your manuscripts. Download them onto an external flash drive and save them for a rainy day four or so years from now. Even the ones you don’t like are worth keeping - I guarantee you somebody else likes them even if you don’t. (I’m speaking to myself here, too.) Project 2025 has blatantly laid out a ban of pornography, and they will take that to mean whatever they want it to; I suggest you don’t even keep your fics on a Google drive if possible it’s definitely easier to keep them all online, trust me, I know, but so does the government. Corporations do not care about you: they will sell you out to whoever is willing to pay. Remember also to turn off AI scraping wherever possible, or better yet use sites that don’t engage in that behaviour.

For further reading from people more qualified than I, here’s the OTW’s statement on what their plans are so far.

I hope I’m wrong. I honestly would love nothing more. But more importantly, we will get through this. Humanity has told stories and put blorbos in situations for literal millennia. We’ll see the other side of this.